Tuesday July 27th

The comic:

Ha ha, see some programs are tape delayed, but their real life game is delayed because he needs tape because his dad is too cheap to buy another wooden bat. Or to save money and get a metal one.

Also, electrical tape? Ooh la la, look who's fancy pants now! My mom recently tried to block the sun from waking her up (she couldn't pull the blinds down because Mikey would wreck them, I assume), using purple duct tape and black garbage bags, thank you very much! It didn't work so well, the tape started peeling, my sister says it's because of the heat (??) but we didn't use no fancy electrical tape...

Wait, what the front door is "electical" tape?

Is it supposed to be a cute Family Circus malapropism? Well, it's not like he replaced one word, he just mispronounced the real one. Or more likely, Brookins ran out of room in the speech bubble and misspelled the word himself. Because if you're old enough to play baseball, you're old enough to pronounce "electrical" the right way.

Also, this shows that Pluggerville is in some unrealistic America (or perhaps the America of their youth?) because I live in a neighborhood with a lot of spaces for a game of baseball. And we're next to a baseball stadium.

My sister, our friend, and I played baseball in the front yard - it was fun and stupid, because each person was on both teams at once.

And people throw balls around at the park, though the only sport I've seen played is football. Baseball can be risky if you're a good batter - smash goes the window. Oh no, it hit a car!

We don't have sandlots anymore, and our parents don't want us playing in abandoned, empty lots anyway.

And make-it-up-as-you-go-along baseball is much more fun.

Pluggers think they're Charlie Brown and the gang, playing baseball without adult supervision. Well, they're not.


ELECTICAL? Really? This got published? Hey, all of you unemployed people looking for work, don't remind yourself that even the shittiest print comic means that someone is getting paid. It's especially galling when it's a legacy strip or run on reader's contributions, like this one.

Monday July 26th

The comic:

They don't know how lucky they are to be able to retire. The next generation may not be able to. Or they'll be shoved out from their old job at 65 and have to supplement their retirement with a job at Wal-Mart. In fact, one of the first ones I covered showed a "senior Plugger" working there.

So Pluggers are elitists.

Or they got into their vaunted blue collar job with a great union. Commies.

Saturday July 17th

I apologize for posting these later in the day, I've been going to bed before midnight for the last few days, no matter how much I sleep during the day. (Today it was from 1:30 to 6:45, finally I slept through the worst of the heat!)

The comic:

She looks thrilled.

Why doesn't the inside door handle work? I'd also think that the outside handle would be fight back, at the very least. Or just fall off, like I saw in an Archie story.

So he's not really chivalrous, he just has a crappy car and refuses to fix it. (Probably made it worse by trying himself, but in true Hank Hill fashion, won't let a stranger touch his baby. "Another man touching her manifold.")

And it is damn creepy to be next to a door you can't open, or at least weird. I've been in a cop car a few times, when Tiger Patrol wasn't up (they use golf carts and drive wildly, so much fun), despite the fact that it was during the hours they were supposed to be up. So I got a ride in a cop car, in the backseat. No interior door handle.

Also, my mom has a Toyota Tundra (2002) and it has a handle on the back door which is useless unless the front door is open. So when my sister's upfront and I need to get out (when they drop me off), I have to remind her to open her door. That's part of the design.

And I must say that my mom only gets her truck taken care of at Toyota. There's no shame in asking for help.

Her car is 8-9 years old (we bought it in late 2001) and it's still in good shape.

She looks quite resigned as well, the wife. ("I bet his mistress has a flashy sports car with working doors," she thinks.)

I understand keeping things until they fall apart - I had a holey shirt that I got at a yard sale and towards the end, I had to wear a white camisole underneath, the holes were getting higher. It eventually became more hole than shirt, so I threw it out. But while I had it, I made sure to do my own laundry! My mom wants many of my shirts (mostly pajama tanks that are see-through through age and washings - but being threadbare makes them cooler temperature-wise) in the trash, but if I do my own laundry, she can't grab them. Bwahaha!

But clothes are not tons of metal and they can't kill people like a bad car can. So the fact that he takes pride in the fact that his car doesn't work will only end in tears.

It's also a sign that the basic description is a joke - you'd think blue-collar workers would spend the weekend tinkering with their cars and improving them. But hey, let's just trap the wife in the car. Though she could get out by climbing over the center console or just sliding out if it doesn't have one. I have climbed from the backseat to the front and the reverse... while the truck was moving. But I'm an idiot teenager, so what do I know?

Friday July 16th

The comic:

Pluggers care about fashion? No.

They care about being smug. Look at his face.

So this makes the intended audience quite happy.

Thursday July 15th

The comic:

Ew.

Front... tickle?

Back to Psych.

Wednesday July 14th

The comic:

W.

T.

F.

Tuesday July 13th

The comic:

Well no shit sherlock, you got the ones with just one slot per day, instead one with 2 or 4 per day. And you didn't label them when you set them up. And you don't have a list of your medications, so you can take a look and see which ones are for evening and which are for the morning. I take more at 8am than I do at 8pm, so that's obvious.

I have a great pill dispenser - it's got the 4 compartments per day, and I can remove a day and take it with me if I'm going to be out at a time when I need to take medication (2pm or 8pm usually... 8am on surgery days).

That really rocks.

So yeah, no sympathy. And why didn't anyone help you? You could have said to the pharmacist, I have to take pills twice a day, but I only have this as a pill dispenser. But asking for help is against the Plugger creed.

I mean, mixing up your meds like that could cause serious problems - some drugs should only be taken before bed.

Research FAIL.

Heartwarming? No.

Something I can relate to? No, and I hope others can't. They're not that expensive, people!

Funny? Hahahahaha, no, except that he bought the stress upon himself.

But it's about taking medication, and only old people take medication daily (notice they didn't say "senior Plugger" this time and he's not drawn especially old) so run that shit.

Blech.

Saturday July 10th

The comic:

Bully for them.

But why not junk/antique shops? They have some great things as well - I found so many old comics and MAD magazines after my graduation (dressy sandals, pretty dress, and flipping through dusty old things).

The only issue I have is if I get a Goosebumps book I already have.

I guess this is supposed to be funny because we go to yard sales without planning most of the time? (love looking through the classifieds to see who paid for an ad... and then has no books and just baby crap)

And I do go to Goodwill on a whim when I'm near the big one. But I do want to go to the new one in my town because my purse I bought in December 2007 may not last forever, and I once looked at purses in a regular store - similar styles, high prices (I paid like 5 bucks for the one I have). So I want a back-up.

I wonder if the owner at yard sale likes someone with a list. I usually look around and then ask if they have any books and then go on my way. Thrift stores? They'd probably be really pissed if you asked if they had a specific item.

And I've never seen 8 tracks, just records.

Friday July 9th

The comic:

Ha ha, he has trouble walking!

Heartwarming? No.

Funny? Hell no, especially to those in that situation.

Familiar? For some people.

From Reed Hoover? Yes. Publish it!

Thursday July 8th

The comic:

But you can drive through the country even if you don't live there.

Also, I was in a ritzy subdivision in a rich suburb for more than a week, and I had no reception in the kitchen/family room. I could text, but not get calls. And when I went outside, if I was under the porch roof, the reception was still bad.

Plus, many many many iPhone owners have griped about how AT&T is shit in New York City, the opposite of Pluggerville and not "country."

This would work better if it said "so far out in the country, that you have to drive a mile to use your cell phone."

Because breakdowns happen everywhere and dead zones are everywhere - we have Sprint but on our old carrier, again with the kitchen and no service.

Wednesday July 7th

The comic:

Safety razors?

I don't know and I don't really want to know.

The idea of these creatures shaving is disturbing enough without the visuals, thank you very much.

Why haven't we seen anything about female Pluggers shaving their legs? Or not, because they wear pantyhose. Or they draw it on, like they did during the war. I'd just love to see a reference to shaving legs starring the Chicken lady. My one request. I don't ask for much.

Tuesday July 6th

This blog is very important in the summer, because it lets me know what day it is. Only problem is, I update it before going to bed, so even though it's technically Tuesday, it's not Tuesday til I wake up at 8. (And then go back to bed until Jeopardy at 3:30.)

The comic:

Those legs are quite scary - why aren't his arms equally thin?

I always say the best part about being fat is the boobies. Because of medications, I've gained some weight over the last couple months (like fast enough to get tons of stretch marks) and yes, my boobs have grown.

Poor men, they don't have an acceptable place for fat. Except men get less guilt over being fat, so...

Also, it's cute that they call it a "diet" - we know it means that RhinoMan is starving because he's so poor.

And the gender change is... interesting. I guess they couldn't show a sad chicken or dog lady looking sadly at her deflated chest. Too risqué, I'd imagine.

You know, in this country, I think it costs more to lose weight on purpose than it does to gain it. Fat camps are expensive, diet food is expensive, and no one ever factors in the time - sometimes you don't have the time for the exercise or the counting of calories or of points. Or the money for weight watchers, because people who have lost weight say a support group helps a lot.

I read something interesting at the Fat Nutritionist (that I can't find right now) about why those ignorant poor, fat people buy fast food instead of healthy fruit. Fruit doesn't have a lot of calories. We need calories (aka food) to live. 10 bucks gets you more calories at McDonalds than it does at a fruit stand. That made a lot of sense to me when I read it, something just clicked.

Me? My doctors haven't told me to lose weight, so I'm doing my hardest not to care. I've got some comfy shorts, maybe I'll have to buy new pants in October or something (maybe my weight will have dropped 50 pounds by then - who knows with me), my pajamas fit (it's summer), and I walk when I can (heat, pain). Food? When I feel like shit, I eat what I want. Eating something grody (or dangerous - like broccoli) when I'm in excruciating pain... that's just inhumane, man.

Monday July 5th

American readers (ha, like anyone reads this but me) - have a good fourth? I slept til almost noon, watched Blast from the Past, baseball, and the Simpsons. Then we played with the dogs - Mikey gnawed on me, my mom, and my dog. (My dog is 50 pound chow mix, Mikey is a 10 pound poodle/terrier mix.)

Then the fireworks. That my mom and sister set off in our driveway. Dixie hates fireworks. This is well known. She was not happy and neither was I. Bloody holiday!


On to the comic!

As I established earlier, Hank Hill is a Plugger. He has a stud finder.

But I'm learning that Pluggers are contradictory creatures - if I were to look at a month's worth of comics, I'm sure I'd find at least one that contradicted a previous one.

Or they don't mind any excuse to hate on technology - though a stud finder? Really? Oh well, it's a stud finder, er, "joke" in the comics that doesn't refer to dating or sex, so that's something.

Also, to avoid holes in your walls, you're supposed to put tape on... something. I want to say the wall...

I'm still at the thumbtack and tape stage.

Wait - WTF is their stud finder? Him? His hammer? Plain old luck? I think putting multiple holes in your wall is more costly than a stud finder, which doesn't even cost 20 US dollars! At Wal-Mart's website, the stud finder is so cheap, it comes with a drill... that costs 15 US dollars. Oh the humanity!

On one more note - I think stud finders are cool and they're the one tool I can play with without breaking it or me or the house. I hope. It would be so fun to find all the studs in the walls! Okay, I'm weird. But taking on Pluggers makes you weird, we all know that.

Saturday July 3rd

The comic:

On all that fur!

Two things marking her as a different Plugger - "senior" and "ladies". Senior bothers me because I know women start using that expensive snake oil in their 30s or 20s.

"Ladies" bothers me because all women are so gullible and vain, amirite? It has nothing to do with our youth-obsessed couple or the fact that older men with wrinkles and gray hair look "distinguished" and want a younger woman, or a younger-looking one, at least. Plastic surgery is out of a Pluggers' price range, but all she's spent on gunk for her face over the years is probably more than what a face lift would cost - it just seems like more for the surgery because it's all at once (or on installments).

I use moisturizer. I was a senior in high school, and I "should" be a senior in August, but I don't think I will be. 4th year, yes, but I'm probably not graduating next May.

Anyways, I have dry skin. The right moisturizer is a godsend for everyone, male or female, old or young. I guess moisturizer makes your skin look young as well? I wouldn't know, I already look young all the time.

This makes me sad - I wish this was homey and sweet (gag-inducing) - a Plugger grandmother doesn't need anti-wrinkle cream, because she knows they're part of her life. And it would show her pointing at some with her granddaughter on her lap - "These are laugh lines - I've had a happy life." or "Your mother gave me these!" Off camera - "Mom!"

Or even better - she's complaining about her wrinkles and her partner says, "I love them, they're a map of our life together." (Or - "The laugh lines, frown lines, lines from thinking - they prove you're not a robot!") *cut to snuggle time*

Oh yeah, they're called "apps" because you apply them to your face.

"Trying to look young and wasting money - there's an app for that."

But I thought the iPod and such were designed to be easy to use, especially by people who aren't that comfortable with technology, like, oh "seniors."

Besides, what do they say? Getting old is better than the alternative!

Friday July 2nd

The comic:

That squirrel is effing creepy.

And it's so nice that they care about the birds. They watch the birds eating because someone stole their TV because they don't live in a bird feeder and are like my sister, who thinks locking the door at night is "overdoing it."

Thursday July 1st

The comic:

Only Pluggers bought T-shirts at events before 2000.

I'd say we're all Pluggers, but we also wear things from after 2000, so we're safe. I think.

However, if I found an interesting design on a shirt from an event at Goodwill or something, I may get it. And don't doubt hipsters. Also, there are undoubtedly new shirts made up with the poster for Woodstock on it, or for any concert from the '60s or '70s.

And of course it's bluegrass.

Wednesday June 30th

The comic:

He's rocking out to Pat Boone.

And I don't even want to get into what "less volume" means - he can't twist and do the mashed potato like he used to?

Also, I can't dance, and I used to listen exclusively to oldies and songs that had guitar in them. But I never played air guitar. I just danced badly and ran around scaring the dogs.

Tuesday June 29th

The comic:

Sent in by a man.

Did he do this in secret, so the woman he hates so much wouldn't see it?

I'm going to say yes.

It's one thing to show respect for your partner, it's quite another to meekly do what they say, secretly hating them the entire time. And for the dominating partner, it's important to ask their opinions on doing things, though since it's always the man being meek around his wife in Pluggerville, and men in Pluggerville don't talk about their feelings...

Hey wait, if they live stereotyped gender roles, shouldn't he have already mowed the yard? It's not like women do that!

Plus, Hank Hill is a Plugger, and he has a tiny yard and a riding mower and he loves his lawn.

She's treating him like a moody teenager, and he's acting like one.

Monday June 28th

The comic:

Say what? They don't use it for Farmville like everyone else their age?

She doesn't look pleased - maybe she went to a different school or wasn't there that year.

Or perhaps she's skeptical and they're going to call up Wally Bikechane (WTF) and ask him to do that again. Was he eating it and then laughed and it went out, like when liquids go out your nose at the wrong moment? I've heard soda burns like hell.

Saturday June 26th

The comic:

I know dogs can get sunburns - hairless breeds, dogs who got their summer shaves, but I have never heard of putting sunblock on them. The normal thing is to keep their outside time to a minimum when the sun is out.

And, forgetting the animal aspect for a second, why do older Pluggers need more sunblock? Because they lose the hair on their heads and a head sunburn is mighty uncomfortable? (Only thing stopping me from shaving my head. That, and I like it when it's braided.)

My first thought was that it was a fat "joke" - they have more body to cover because they got fat, see?

But balding is probably it.

However, this is just wrong, wronger than anything else involving these creatures and I am going to pet a real dog and pretend this never happened.

I suggest you all do the same if you want to survive the weekend.

And wear your sunblock! Despite what my ignorant sister thinks, people with all shades of skin color can get burned and damaged, so get the strongest SPF you can find if you want to go out in the sunniest part of the day! I lost my uncle to skin cancer, I need to take my own advice next time I go out after 10am.

Friday June 25th

The comic:

That's a very labored set-up and a very exact, unique situation.

When I'm going to stay in a hotel for a long period of time, I bring enough clothes so I don't have to do laundry. And if I'm going to be somewhere long enough to do laundry, I'm usually at a place that has a washer and dryer that does not require coins, like a relative's place.

And really, the casinos are the only place people go for vacation?

Thursday June 24th

The comic:

Wow.

Oh wait, I just remembered last summer (or was it the summer before?) when the government offered coupons for the converter box so you could continue to get your network channels in peace.

Before that, I was in awe that they bothered with the converter box.

Plugger question - why does his TV still work but his car is falling apart? TVs are harder to fix and harder to understand. Though maybe they were simpler back then, what do I know about Philcos?

And despite being a disrespectful teenager (I'm 21) I do appreciate a B&W movie or TV show. Andy Griffith in black and white means Barney is still there - in color, he's gone. And I saw a colored version of Mughal-e-Azam that was hideously colored. The director died and he wanted it colored and you can see the scenes he colored (the colors look natural) vs the ones attacked with highlighters.

Futurama's on! And it's new!!!

ETA: I know how to hook up the DVD player, the Wii, and my computer (provided the TV has a VGA port) and a bit about the cable (in the dorm, the cord goes on the wall, and then on my TV! Magic! That does not mean I am a TV expert, just like the fact that I can type without looking and use the internet easily does not mean I am a computer expert. (Though with our old one, I was able to add extra RAM so I could update the Sims (the original, spluh!) - I could take apart the computer casing and do that. But that's about it.) 

Hank Hill is a Plugger

And I cannot stand him.

Dale, however, is awesome.

And I would love to live with Bill (as a platonic roommate) and introduce him to the world of Bollywood and cheer him up.

Bobby is also awesome.

Peggy is at times.

But Hank is a major Plugger - he doesn't like new technology, especially computers, and the old way is always best. He also believes in rigid gender roles, hurting his son again and again.

He's also right repeatedly. The episode I just saw involved MySpace (a couple years too late) and he thought it would lead to disaster... and it did.

Wednesday June 23rd

The comic:

And you vote for somebody who wants to slash social security, which means you have to get a job when you thought you'd be done. But if you vote for the other guy, gays could get married!

Tuesday June 22nd

The comic:

Yeah.

Right.

Why her age? Creepy.

Also, the price of a box of Girl Scout Cookies has gone up, and Pluggers can afford $300 worth of cookies? I'd only get like 10 a year, my freezer isn't that big.

Though I prefer Tagalongs to Thin Mints.

And cookies to Pluggers.

But that's a given.

Monday June 21st

The comic:

Um.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

We have one plate hanging up, and it's not collectible by any measure, especially since it's split in two.

I'm lost. Boggled in the brain.

Saturday June 19th

The comic:

Ha ha, people age! Isn't it funny!

And why is he confused? He had to know what movie/sitcom he was watching, right?

And why doesn't he just watch the classics and ignore the fact that actors choose different roles as they age?

Because then he'd have nothing to whine about.

I'm more shocked by my relatives aging, especially my cousins who are kids who I don't see that often. "What do you mean she's graduating from high school?!"

Pluggers don't like change. I get it. So why seek it out? I don't see anyone forcing him to watch it! And what actor is he talking about? Six shooters? An actor who did that is probably dead now! And if he's Clint Eastwood, I doubt he's done a movie with a minivan.

This would work better if he was reading about the new movie online or in the paper - or his grandchild was telling him about it - "Hey, your favorite star from when you were a kid is in this movie... as the grandfather."

Or I could be charitable and say he's watching a commercial for some "wacky" summer movie, but no, I've seen Pluggers put themselves in situations just so they can whine, so no charity!

Friday June 18th

The comic:

This reminds me of The Sound of Music.

Does anyone really whistle for their kids? I thought they just shouted. This is bizarre, and just an excuse to bash the internet. Again.

They could have shown a Plugger whistling for their pet to come. Or walking along, whistling a tune.

But no, that would make sense.

I'm on Twitter as MemphisKaitlyn if you're curious!

Thursday June 17th

The comic:

But this caption is too long - "Reading only the single-panel comics is Plugger speed reading."

Also - ha ha, this is a single-panel comic too!

And you can't save the newspaper for later in the day to enjoy because...

And the love of Family Circus is okay - they look at the little children as we look at them - some weird species.

But the Marmaduke love gives me a headache - it features humans and animals - and animals that don't talk to wear clothes or read the paper.

And I am quite disappointed that Brookins didn't plug himself - instead of Marmaduke (another animal - competition!), he should have said Pluggers.

And then your head would explode.

Wednesday June 16th

The comic:

I think I've seen this.

Anyway, I remember my dad settling down to polish his shoes... on dress days... when he was in the military.

The average white-collar worker does not polish their shoes. Especially tennis shoes. And flip-flops - which, if made of the right material, can be washed with a hose.

Anyways, this is his job. He's probably been doing it since 18, since his dad and grandfather worked there. He's most likely part of a union.

But he looks so dejected - does he think she's going to change her mind one day and say, sure make the house muddy - it's not like I've been working all day and just cleaned up after our kids!

Of course, the cynic would say a little mud wouldn't be noticed in a Plugger household. Except, Pluggers love stereotypes, especially sexist ones. And we all know wives henpeck their husbands and are so picky they don't want a bit of dirt in the house!

Also, washing his shoes won't help - maybe hose off the bottom, but unless they're waterproofed on the outside, they'll take some time to dry and he needs them for work tomorrow. So why not just kick them off outside and put on indoor shoes?

When my shoes are too nasty or I got caught in the rain, they sit on the porch. And they take a bit to dry out.

Also, that lunch box is too ridiculous and old fashioned - Plugger men love them!

Tuesday June 15th

The comic:

Ha ha, his vehicle is worthless, but he depends on it because he lives in Pluggerville, which is rural and thus has no public transportation and very little sidewalks away from the shopping areas, so he needs his poor car to survive. He doesn't make enough to repair or restore his car, the only money he can put towards his car is just for cas.

This is hilarious.

And does he carry the boots between the cab and the truck bed? Because every time I see that, I assume a poor guy is being held there by his boots and being dragged around, head near the road.

That poor cop. The Plugger doesn't care, so why should he? But it's better than his other calls about teenagers playing their "heavy metal" Christian music too loud.

Also, most of the Pluggers episodes devoted to cars are about they're in terrible shape - so how can he find it? Oh yeah, license plate - if it's not covered in mud.

And like my mom says about our crappy things - if someone wants our stuff, they must be worse off than us.

So... how does someone who likes this comic take this? Ha ha, I identify, my car is POS too!

One last thing - when we lived in Italy about 20 years ago (OMG), my parents put a sign on the car saying the door was unlocked, take the radio, but please don't break the glass. I don't understand why glass for car windows was so hard to get in 1990 in mainland Europe, but go figure. Also, the pollution was terrible and the rats there could give NYC rats a run for their money. But the Adriatic Sea was gorgeous, and our off-base apartment had marble floors... perfect for a baby and a toddler!

Wednesday June 2nd

The comic:

I... what?

Three lines to say "Pluggers have no friends."

That is a new one.

And they did write... e-mails. Go to the library, pay off the fine, and take a computer course.

THIS is a classic? It's depressing, and I've been suicidal, I know depressing!

Tuesday June 1st

The comic:

Dixie is 13.

She still has a full coat.

Er, she would if we didn't just get it shaved for the summer.

Drawing FAIL.

And did he have Shawn Cassidy hair?

Monday May 31st

The comic:

There is no "classic" by Brad Wesner that is patriotic and sappy?

Why doesn't he have glasses on? The way his eyes are drawn, it doesn't look like he can see much.

Also, why does she care?

Unless she recommended the book based on its ending. (Shutter Island for example - though its last lines give nothing away.)

Sometimes I like knowing spoilers/endings ahead of time because it's fun to see how it all adds up - and I will watch or read something again going nah, it's not gonna happen and bam, it does. Also, while watching Bunty aur Babli, I get nervous each time they're on the train towards the end - will they go to jail or not?! My friend thought I was so batty because I told her I'd scene it 50 times and was still like oh no what will happen!

...I really get into movies.

Saturday May 29th

The comic:

This looks familiar.

Of course, the premise is so old and insulting.

Ha ha, men can't cook! Ha ha, they're eating pizza!

And take-out? I guess you save on a tip.

Meh. Stereotype, not funny, rerun not marked as such - grade F.

Another Hi and Lois Plugger Sighting

The comic:

I last sent a hand-written letter in 2006. It was sent with a check in gratitude to a friend who sent me a big box full of MAD magazines from the '70s and '80s along with the books.

And there is a thrill in getting mail in the mailbox... though you learn quickly that most will be bills and junkmail.

Comics where the characters don't age are so... weird when they talk about technology. I can't pinpoint why.

Though they don't age in Foxtrot and it works. I think it's because Bill Amend actually knows things about technology and pop culture.

This is just another way of saying "the old ways are best." I do want to send more mail to save the post office and mail on Saturday - I mean, Netflix may jack up their prices if there's no USPS anymore.

But a letter is touching - and so is a card. It's a sign you spent some money in addition to the thought. Though the best is a short note in a big box from Grandma that has candy and old family pictures and peppers that mom and her brother will fight over...

Anyway, this is non-soap opera comic without a joke or punchline. Or is it that we think progress is good, but it really isn't? I think most women, non-white Americans, GLBTQ people, people with disabilities, poor people, and on and on might disagree. Some old things are nice, but for the most part, we're always moving forward and it usually has good results. (I can't imagine my life a generation ago - no internet, shoddy psychiatric care, and college without the internet?! I saw the registration scene in "Back to School" and was quite shocked.)

Oh, I do have a point. Letters have their place. So does e-mail. So does texting. It's not a zero sum game, you can use all - nothing is stopping you.

The attitude I get from this comic and most Pluggers related to technology is that one (the older) is better - period. And the new ways are bad - period.

Text messages are awesome - one morning, I got a text from my mom (because I wake up after she's at school - and the reception for texts is better than that for calls in a lot of places) saying I was smart. It really made me happy. Of course, most days her texts "just" said that she loved me.

Friday May 28th

The comic:

How would the cashier know if he tried them on or now?

And why would she care?

Men are so lucky - 44 inches is 44 inches no matter what the brand. A 12 isn't a 12 everywhere and neither is a Large.

I hate trying on clothes (I get overheated, and it's so fun to see this perfect dress that you thought was near your size show off your tits if it can get up there), so I try to get comfy clothes that are labeled with letters and assume I need a L or XL. For something new or fancy (not a t-shirt or basic tank), I'll try it on.

I got new shorts last week and tried them on over my shorts... and tennis shoes. They fit fine.

Also, I am envious of people - no matter what their size - who don't have fluctuating weight and know their sizes won't change from year to year... or week to week. That's why I stick with sweats/yoga pants/whatever.

Though last time I bought jeans, I only tried on the first pair in the size that worked, then bought others from the same brand, so the sizes would mean the same thing. And they fit wonderfully! However, jeans hurt whether they fit or not, so... elastic.

Bah. Men's clothes seem so easy, but they do have a minefield in what's "acceptable" at work - just what is business casual? But men don't have big boobs, a big waist, and a small butt. Or the reverse. Curves are a bitch to cover without looking like a hooker or wearing something way too big - and then there are height issues...

And I haven't even wandered into the world of suits and work clothes.

Oh, where were we? Male Pluggers are smug lucky jerks. (Pluggers are smug by default. Except RhinoMan.)

I'm surprised they didn't go for the stereotype of having the wife do the shopping - some men honestly don't know their sizes, because the women in their lives have always shopped for them.

Oh! I just remembered a funny (and humiliating) sequence from The Agony of Alice by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor.

Alice needs new jeans, and her older brother takes her shopping. He gets her many sizes and they don't fit, not even the smallest pair! She thinks she's a freak of nature, until a female sales associate tells them that she needs girls jeans.

So maybe we should do the shopping.

Does a long post make up for a... huh... only four days? It felt like a longer absence.

Monday May 24th

The comic:

Because he handles iron, geddit?

This isn't objectionable, it's not funny by any means, but look, he's got a job! They're talking about a movie that came out recently!

But you'd think Pluggers would enjoy comic books and movies made from them - don't Pluggers deserve 2 hours or so of escapism in some AC?

Monday May 10th

The comic:

Ha ha, Pluggers wear their pants up high!

This is what you kick off "classics week" with? Reed Hoover is a hack, but Brookins is worse.

Saturday May 8th

The comic:

His ears scare me. Also, going on the RhinoMan's story - he is at a friend or relative's house and they lent him decent pajamas. Or he broke in and put on the pjs and is raiding the fridge because his biggest fantasy in life is having a midnight snack. Ha, imagined poverty is funny!

Also, he's not thinking outside the box. If he was, we'd see an open cupboard (though the angles that would require showing more than RhinoMan and an open fridge in a blank void would probably break our heads) or at least the freezer would be open. That would be literal.

Is this supposed to be literal - he'll take food out of the box. Or is it, ha, Pluggers only think of food and that's funny because um, it just is.

No idea.



I'm not doing better health wise, but school is over (except for a 12 page paper, I just want to take an F, I'm so lazy) and I'm on the couch and the dogs need to be in. So mentally, I'm in a better place. So Monday, maybe?

Friday May 7th

The comic:

Pluggers have butts?

Pluggers have curves?

Pluggers don't have a Hank Hill butt? (And he is such a Plugger - so smug. He and Andy Griffith are total Pluggers - "real" folks and so damn smug.)

I think the point is "Pluggers are fat" and the drawing says "Pluggers are fat and it depresses them."

Or maybe this has something to do with guy jeans I don't get?

Anyways, Pluggers are fat! Hoo doggie, what a knee-slapper! Fat people are funny! I tell jokes and make people laugh, and I'm fat. Now I know they only laughed because I'm fat. (Or when I was sick and skinny, because they could tell the future and knew I'd be fat one day.)

Thanks Pluggers for clearing up my misconceptions! Now I know I'm nothing more than my hilariously fat body.

If "Pluggers are fat" wasn't funny, why would it be repeated on a regular basis?


That still doesn't mean this comic makes a lick of sense. Oh well, Texans. What can you expect.


ETA: Ha! "Fat jokes" are funny - Hagar the Horrible writer Chris Browne agrees with me! Or he wouldn't make one every week as well. It's so much fun breaking things and possibly hurting yourself, oh man, I'm going to laugh so much I might cry. Or punch the monitor.

Saturday May 1st

The comic:

Ahahahahahahahahahahaha - finally, the comic does its job. I can't stop laughing.

Wish they'd gone with the original name, because the Plugger could oh-so-innocently bring some tea bags to the tea party. (Someone must have finally told the teadiots about urban dictionary, le sigh.)

Hahahahahhahahahahahaha, shit I'm going to tumble off the bed soon.

Thanks, Marion!

Blogging Against Disablism Day 2010

Because of various issues related to my disability, I cannot sit down and write a post about Blogging Against Disablism Day or something in general, abstract. I cannot think properly due to pain and the side effects of medication.

So I'm throwing up a link to the site, which includes a round-up of various posts dealing with disabilities/chronic illnesses and how much society just SUCKS when dealing with them.


Blogging Against Disablism Day 2010

From my personal blog, I have three posts dealing with disability and disablism.

I've talked about my health since the beginning (it's why I started - to record my horrific experiences in a psych ward in 2006), but the first addressing disability and activism and such was in November of last year with "Spoon Theory and Me (It's all about me)".

Since then, I have had many posts mentioning my health and whatnot, but recently, I did two separate posts dealing with disabilist attitudes and health.

"Medication for Bipolar Disorder and TV Shows"

"Pajama Jeans and ableism"

Off to watch Dexter.

Yeah.

So.

My health has been especially heinous since the last time I posted.

And judging by tonight, it's not getting better any time soon.

Normally, mocking Pluggers would be a welcome distraction, but it's just not working for me right now.

It's not like I'm not online and I haven't shut myself off like I've done before - I still comment at some sites, still post at my favorite message board, hey, I started tweeting. Still do facebook.

I just... can't.

Well, in two weeks' time, I'll be at home and this horrible semester will be behind me (and the mountains of paperwork for filing for disability will be ahead of me... oy) and who knows.

Also, it's hard to mock Pluggers the few times they're not being smug a-holes. Because what's so funny about poor health or poverty? I guess I could just say "Ha ha, he's so poor he's doing X, isn't that what America wants to see in its comics? It's so funny! Why aren't you laughing?" It's like Funky Winkerbean some days, and the smirks come on the smug days. "Pluggers don't know what this new thing is, and they don't care" and "Pluggers are good people (non-Pluggers are not)".

So.

No promises.

Saturday April 10th

The comic:

The caption says "Pluggers' 'don't ask, don't tell'." And features the female chicken Plugger standing in front of an open fridge, looking towards the male dog Plugger (and the audience), asking, "Did you take the last piece of cake out of the fridge?" The dog has a guilty look on his face, food on his mouth, and he's holding a plate with a piece of cake on it. And he's using a fork.


This hurts my head. He can't tell right now because his mouth is full, but WTF? Is she going to kick him out of the house once she finds out he did take the cake? Because he was foolish enough to use silverware, leaving a trail behind.

So do stereotypical wives (as if there are any other in Pluggerville) not ask if their stereotypical husbands eat "bad" food?

But she did ask.

THIS MAKES NO SENSE!!!

Friday April 9th

A day turned into a week, spring fever?

The comic:

The caption says "A plugger 'last call'." and features a shot of the side of a house, with the female chicken Plugger leaning out the door, calling to a medium-sized dog (drawn surprisingly well), saying "C'mon boy, finish up!... It' (sic) time for bed!"


It's time for my bed, you mean. Yes, I know the joy of "I want out" at 2 in the morning. And then waiting, because not only must business be taken care of, the perimeter must be inspected.

The only thing is, I'd never call it a "last call."

"Pluggerisms" are the only thing separating me and most dog owners (who have indoor/outdoor dogs who sleep inside most nights) from being Pluggers.

What a nightmare.

Thursday April 1st

I've been doing this 3 years as of today.

I'm taking today off.

Wednesday March 31st

The comic:

The caption says, "After a plugger has lived it up, he has to live it down." It was sent in by Brad Wesner of Simpsonville, South Carolina and the box says "Thanks to..." which is nice, I guess. There are four Pluggers, two standing, two sitting. One is seated on the other side of the counter, and one is standing on the other side as well, so we can two fully, including the RhinoMan Plugger. A Bear Plugger is seated close to us, and a Dog Plugger is the other one sitting, holding up pictures and grinning a smug grin with his teeth showing. He is saying, "Remember the St. Patrick's Day Party, Andy, when you wore that lampshade on your head?" They appear to be in a diner and the fourth person is a female Plugger and I cannot tell her breed - no rabbit ears, no chicken beak. She is laughing. RhinoMan has no expression I can understand, but "Andy," the bear one looks horrified.



Anyways, Pluggers don't get to have fun that often and when they do, their so-called friends like to make fun of them. Pluggerville seems like a great place to live!

Also, lampshade on the head? Wow, creative!

And RhinoMan has no embarrassing pictures. I imagine he was eating at a booth (alone) and came over because he wanted to be part of the public shaming. I wonder how the Dog Plugger will use the pictures. Blackmail, of course, but what does he want?

Tuesday March 30th

The comic:

The caption says "A plugger's serving size is all-he-can-eat." It was sent in by Merla Mae Russel of Marion, Iowa, and is called a "classic". This means nothing, because they once called something a classic that was about five months old. It shows a happy Plugger, with a big grin on his face and his tongue stuck out, as if he's licking his lips in anticipation of "all-he-can-eat." He is a bear monster. He is holding a can that says BEEF RAVIOLI 39 oz, and pouring the whole thing into a bowl. I think that's the side of a microwave next to the bowl, because cold ravioli is icky. The drawing is pretty good except for the Plugger himself, but since we don't see much of him, the only bad part is the hand holding the bowl.



Only male Pluggers get to do that - a lady must watch her figure, after all!

I can't be too mad, he looks happy. And food is good. It keeps you alive.

And you should eat what fills you up. Serving suggestions are jokes and they're mostly used for misleading advertising - only 5 calories in a bottle of our soda! (5 calories per serving and how many servings?)

I want some canned ravioli. That sounds good. (College student with chronic pain condition whose pain is slowly going away. Ten minutes from now, this would be a dissertation length and make no damn sense to anyone but me, and not even me come the morning.)

Monday March 29th

The comic:

The caption says "When a plugger opens her mailbox, it's more pills and bills." It shows a monstrosity opening a mailbox, holding boxes as envelopes fall to the ground. It is poorly drawn. It was sent in by Robert Webb of Gainesville, Georgia.

Uh... what? It rhymes, so that's why? I expected "more pills THAN bills" and when copying the caption, I typed that and had to go back and put it right.

So Pluggers get their prescriptions through the mail. Bully for them. Well, only female ones. Wait - Robert is a male name. Why is it a woman? Why is it "her" mailbox? Who picked the gender - the artist or the real life Plugger?

And what is the point?!

*Trying to make this blog more accessible. My HTML-fu is a bit rusty, so I won't mess with ALT text and just describe (to the best of my abilities) the comic. I will probably use the words "monstrosity" and "poorly drawn" every day. If you didn't know, blind people can use the internet. Text based websites are the most accessible, and describing the image helps a lot.

Saturday March 27th

The comic:

That sick Plugger drawing is scary.

How is it true love? It's only true love if you believe that MILs will fight with their DILs until one dies, but that's a tired old stereotype oh never mind.

Friday March 26th

The comic:

Oh no, my roommate and I are Pluggers. My "bedside table" is my microwave on top of my fridge and hers is two big containers stacked together.

Of course, we're not pretentious and don't call them "end tables" or table of any kind - just a place for our shit.

And why would you keep the dog cage/carrier - open - in the living room? If it's open, the dog can come and go, so why have a carrier? Does he like to sleep in there? If so, it should be in the bedroom, because dogs are clingy little monkeys.

This makes no sense. I just think an overturned milk crate would work better.

This - while serving two purposes - just doesn't make sense. The second purpose is bizarre. For a while, Dixie slept in a carrier (she was a puppy, it was a way to make sure she didn't pee everywhere while I slept) and Mikey slept in the one he came in for a bit before graduating to sleeping on mom's bed and growling at me. No, he growled at me while in the carrier. Ironically, we never used the carrier to take him to the vet. When all the 3 had to go, we used a big cage, the same one we used when we went camping. Sometimes they'd sleep in it while we were camping (with the door shut tight), but we weren't indoors, we were camping.

So this still makes no damn sense.

Thursday March 25th

The comic:

Yes, it's so funny when you don't remember things.

Or when walking up the stairs (though if it's 40 times in a row, maybe) is exhausting.

No, it's not funny, it's "touching". The hell? Okay, so we "identify" with the exhausted Plugger.

It's sad, and we're supposed to (as comic mockers) go ha ha, he's fat and old. Ha ha.

I do have a solution - keep all the glasses in a box, and keep said box with you. Or keep multiple pairs, if you got the money. And computer glasses are different from reading glasses? Lordy. I have my one pair because I'm near-sighted. I never leave them on a different floor. Different room, yes.

And ha - the glasses are on his head! I've tried that, not comfortable.

And an extra dose of knee-slapping hilarity - he forgot what he wanted to do, in addition to bad eyesight. It's so fun to make fun of people's illnesses and infirmities. I know I do. I go to St. Jude weekly and point at the girls and laugh because they are bald.

I won't go back and edit my own posts, but as a chronically ill overweight person who forgets things and wears glasses, I don't think I've been too cruel in the past. If I am mean in the future, it will be towards Brookins, to the genuine fans who think this tripe is worth money. Eh, I'm contributing - no such thing as bad press! But sometimes the comic disgusts me, and not because it's really objectionable, but just because what's the point. They're old. They have illnesses. They're fat (or drawn that way). It's not funny.

Wednesday March 24th

The comic:

Oh they're so foolish. Today's non-Junior Pluggers were never young and carefree, never listened to rock and roll, no no. They were born stereotypes.