It's the weekend

I slept til 9 am yesterday, than from 12 to 4, than from 5:30 to 7:15, than from 12ish to 4am. Gah. I spent most of yesterday asleep, watching TV, or sleepy. (At 10, my mom and I watched an hour-long thing on History about Cults - part 2, according to the bottom of the screen - Charles Manson, this fucked up German guy in Chile who was Pinochet's buddy, and Waco ended it. It creeped the hell out of me - normally, I fill the dog's food at night, but I couldn't during the commercial, because I can't turn the light on, since the cord broke and it's less than 6 inches long and at the top of the shed, and I'm short.)


So here's the weekend - two at once, you win!

Yes, it's not 5 AM yet, but the Sunday paper's here. And looking at today's strip, I'm glad we still waste comic space on "Classic Peanuts" 7 days a week. Same with yesterday's. And the whole mess.



Pluggers are only hard-working as kids, big opponents of abortion, and supporters of child labor, judging by their laziness as adults.

We had a lot of fun with our wheelbarrow when my dad planted our 3 trees - he let us sift through the dirt - I found a piece of copper in the willow tree dirt.

So this poor little Plugger is going to be dirtier than 'Pigpen' his whole life - the caption leads one to believe he'll be 'driving a dump truck' as an adult, as well.

Truthfully, this applies to most middle-class suburban or rural families, the ones with money for yard work, but without money for a gardener.



And speaking of the suburbs!

The ... after the ! is puzzling.

But what's not puzzling is the choice of species - this is plainly a show that he treats his little laborer like a father treats a son, teaching him how to ride a bike so the neighbors can see how 'normal' they are.

Or that's bitterness about my own childhood, where we weren't used a child labor or physically abused, but we were not normal, in a bad way, but my dad had us look normal.

One thing that points to the two being connected - how tired the adult is. Since he makes the kid do all the work, he gets no exercise besides using the remote.

And... why doesn't that kid have training wheels? My sister and I had training wheels, and then they came off, and we didn't have our mom or our dad holding us, we fell. A lot. I hate edged yards to this day, because, on the base, those military jerks would edge their yards into bike tire catching machines. Bah.

Plus - I don't want to know why this is a 'classic'. Did it run before? Did he just discover this submission and it's 10 years old? Or did he use the idea for a different picture and is re-using it for this one?

And - who's the personal trainer? The kid for making his dad run? Or the dad for helping his kid?

Gripe about the Sunday strips - They'll Do It Every Time is also run by reader's submissions. Monday through Saturday, it's a one panel comic. But Sunday! On Sunday, there are 4 or 5 panels in the Sunday space, not just one huge one.

That's why TDIET is better than Pluggers.

Two for Thursday.

I just wrote 'Tue for Thursday'.

It's not Tuesday, that was the other day. I know this.

Yeah, exhausted, woke up late, it was nice outside when I got home (70s, springlike weather in May! Only a fool wouldn't take advantage of that).

That's my excuse.

Let's travel back in time to yesterday, via yesterday's strip.



Ha ha! Parental pluggers don't remember math from when they were in school, proving that their children are right, you don't need math once you're out of school.

Yes, math homework, once you get past 3rd grade, can be tricy for the average parent, because you don't use the skills you learned (or in my mom's case, didn't learn) in your regular life unless you're in one of the few jobs that do.

But "Sudoku" isn't some hoity-toity elitist technological thing...

It's supposedly easy, once you firgure it out. And it's in most daily papers, most magazines, online, it's everywhere but in my MADs.

So I don't buy that the average Plugger doesn't know about Sudoku. They're supposed to be everyfreakycreature, and most everyone does these things. (Not anybody in my house, but some of my relatives do it, and that includes the ones in Nebraska.)

Now, back to the future! Today's strip:



I don't get it.

I don't understand it.

At all.

Not the "joke" or "truth about life", I don't understand one word.

Maybe it means that to turn on high-beams in old cars, you had to use the pedals, and now you don't, and Pluggers are old?

And you don't want a dog near the driver's side floorboard!!!

Done before noon today!

Please, your applause is too much. It's the least I can do.

Today's strip is something I'm not used to.



I lived in Iceland before coming to Memphis. Neither place has typical seasons, only one is cold and the other is hot. Guess which one.

Though I usually do wear that in fall and spring. And winter. Summer as well, but shorts instead. I'm the queen of casual. Though I've branched away from jeans lately, I'm still casual.

However, I've been wearing shorts almost every day for too many weeks - it's been in the 80s and 90s and it's muggy and my bedroom is always hotter than outside at night, even though it's got dark walls, dark shades, and I never open the window past Spring Break. However, it is on the western side of the house (or as close as it gets to being on a compass) and there is nothing next to it to block the sun - second story and our neighbors have one level ranches.

But anyway... yeah... I'm a plugger today.

If you don't give damn about fashion except being comfortable, you're a plugger.

It's okay - this isn't a stupid thing. Don't waste money on fashionable clothes to escape the plugger curse, this will pass.

After re-reading this, I can see it's meant for men. One last week was sent in by a man, but a female creature was used. Why not today, huh?

Because the male artist can't wrap his pea-brain around the thought that women wear jeans and tees too?

Grr.

Sorry for not making sense - I got about 3 hours of sleep last night and I've been putting off a nap, because I know I won't be able to sleep tonight, but I am getting SO tired, guess I can't survive on 3 hours of sleep like I used to.

Old age, I guess. I'll be 19 in less than 3 months. Sad.

Sorry it's so late.

I felt good today, but Sunday's are busy for me - sleep late, watch tv, read all but two sections of the paper and then time for Fox's Sunday lineup.

And we had a Mother's Day thing as well. I made my mom a pillow out of one of my old and clean pajama shirts - what did you do?

Today's strip is meant for next month, since it's about fathers.



Apparently, they believe weight is hereditary in Pluggerville - unless you're a woman, as we learned this week, then you fret and worry yourself sick, but never as thin as you want.

That's all I have to say. I am fried from food and scrubbing the bathroom this morning and last night, and this cartoon actually makes me stupider the longer I look at it.

Good night.

No, I don't know what happened yesterday.

But we have a comic today!



As for todays, I don't get it.

I really should start driving, except the only gasoline not kept in our vehicle is kept in a can for the lawn mower! We depend on the nice people at the dealership to change our oil. And we never kept cans of oil in the trunk.

Are those cans of oil?

I don't know what 'oil investments' are supposed to be - stock in an oil company? Stock in Exxon or something?

But that's not common enough to need twisting - most of us don't own stocks, even us elite-nonpluggers.

And how does it help to have cans of oil in your trunk if your carbreaks down?

I may not drive, but it's my understanding that cars need gasoline to go, and gasoline is refined oil, not a can in your car!

Again with the species confusion.

Who knew a comic aimed at idiots could be so confusing? Hmmph.

Today's strip is a mess of sadism and confusion, nothing surprising.

First - the violence. I don't know about you, but the reason skinny breedless lady looks so scared is because grumpy BearMan has a gun aimed at her through his ugly jacket. Or at least a finger hidden to look like a gun. Their 'tough love' will be free, dammit!

Second - what she ordered is plainly a code word for something sadistic for him in the back room, and the lady behind the counter is new and knows about this but has yet to have someone order it. And he's twice her size and not happy to see her.

Third - "I'll order so he won't flirt with her, in the guise of helping him lose weight."

Mean bunch, these pluggers.

Oh, again with the fat thing.

If you find me lacking in coherent criticism, I am in pain and just woke up after 14 hours of sleep. And before I went to sleep, I threw up.

So, with that in mind...

Here's today's strip.



Pluggers are fat, pass it on.

Peanut Butter!

Someone read this blog yesterday and using time travel, sent today's strip in a few months ago.

Only logical answer.




I love peanut butter and grape jam sandwiches on wheat bread.

In fact, that was just my late breakfast/early lunch (11 AM). It's a hell of a lot easier than opening a can of tuna and mixing in just the right amount of mayo and relish.

As for the dogs - Mikey had eggs with his dog food this morning. Dixie and Wickett got no such luxury - Mikey's delicate. And ugly.

Anyways, I've never let them lick from the jar, but if I make a sandwich because I'm starving and half-way through the one sandwich, I'm nauseatingly full, I share the largess - but only for peanut butter ones. The others, they just get crusts.

I love giving them bread with a bit of peanut butter on it - the look on their face!

We also use Mikey and Wickett to pre-clean dishes. (Old, crappy dishwasher can't get peanut butter off a knife.) Only bread, rice, and eggs, though they want everything.

Dixie's the worst - that dog begs and begs, she hits you until you give her a sliver of whatever. 9 times out of 10, she rolls it around and spits it right out and one of the mini-goats picks it up.

I'd never let them lick the peanut butter jar - Wickett has a very furry muzzle and it's bad enough when he drinks water.

I'm glad it's not a dogman owning a dog. Unless that's his kid and he only gives his kid the last serving of peanut butter...?

Sick.

Pluggers are Milquetoasts

No big surprise really. That word has little to do with milk or toast, sadly.

Here's today's panel.



Finally! Some cohabitation that's right!

They have the same nose.

Now what kind of disagreement ends in "Yes, dear"?

"I'm leaving your stupid ass for a Kennedy"?

"You're fat and ugly - take out the trash"?

"BUY A FUCKING WATCH"?

"Lose some weight, you lard-ass"?

None of my parents' fights ever end that way - trust me, 7 years after the divorce, they still fight. The last one was at her lawyer's office, and he got every word in. Her lawyer kicked her when she tried to talk.

Before the divorce, it ended when the girls scurried upstairs in fear. Or, one after one pleasant dinner fight the summer before the divorce, we didn't have to eat our green beans.

Though now my dad is like the guy in the picture, except he lost all his fat because he's diabetic now. He looks like hell. He called and got pissy with me about paying half of my medical bills ("You're 18, you're an adult *click" ::throw phone down:: Then he left a message saying he'd pay the bills, he just can't read them, all milquetoast-like.)

Back to the cartoon.

It does fit the 'hard-working' aspect - you don't want to piss off your boss, union or no union.

It was sent in by a woman, yet the Plugger's a man in this one. Was it sent in by a wife who always wins arguments? Or sent in by one who always loses, then calls her divorce lawyer?

Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?

There is a cock-a-roach upstairs.

And Dixie? My cock-a-roach killing dog? In my mom's room, asleep.

Oh well, it scuttled into Becky's room.


Onto today's strip.

I can honestly say I was expecting more church ones from the Plugger crowd. I've done 3 Sunday strips, and nada!

We don't have a Dairy Queen here anymore.

I protest!

How is that in anyway dieting?

Oh, it's plugger dieting, they hold the only healthy thing in the meal, yuk yuk yuk.

No, you get a fat-ass burger and hold the bread because you're "on Atkins."

I hate cherries.

I don't like today's pluggers.

It brought back some terrible memories for me.

Here it is.




Not of being that fat, I am fat enough for the drawstrings to be whatever, dangling about a foot below my waist (guys' pj pants have the best designs).

And I have a pair of short shorts that are like the plugger's in the picture. Little nubs sticking out. But I don't have as much of a gut - I wear short shorts with confidence, unless it's so nice I must play outside, then I take a blanket outside and let the dogs drool on me and my book because I am allergic to grass.

80%? Getting closer, huh?


As to the bad memories, just read these. I don't remember if I wrote down the part of them removing the drawstrings from my pants, but they did, so I wouldn't hang myself with them. Only one pair of pants escaped, but all my comfy pants are tainted - no drawstring. I was looking for vaseline last night (cracked feet - don't hurt, but look bad) and then anti-itch cream and I saw, I saw a creme container with the numbers 1624 in purple marker. *shakes* That's the room I stayed in.

Thanks a lot, pluggers.

Sunday the 1st

There is no one in today's credited but the comic's creator, Gary Brookins.

This Plugger is an anthromorphized bear, but then again, all the characters are anthromorphized animals. It's a little creepy at times, as 80% of the American population is not anthromorphized animals, at least they weren't last time time I checked.

So bearman is doing his spring cleaning outside. Judging by what I saw outside yesterday, the first Saturday of spring-like weather, this involves yard work. The first day of spring was less than 2 weeks ago, and everyone's yards have shot up a foot, ours included.

But that's not what bearman is doing.

His spring cleaning involves cleaning out the bed of an old truck. Some identifiable things: A bottle marked 'OIL', a bottle marked 'H2O', a red can of 'Cola', 2 McDonalds type cups with straw - one with the golden arches, a pizza box that says HOT! (PIZZA) YUM!, and oh man, is that one of those styrofoam McDonalds' hamburger holders?

That's how long it takes a plugger to do 'spring cleaning'? More than 15 years? And I understand the bottles and hamburger wrappers, but not the pizza box. Pizza is not something you eat while driving, especially not a large pizza. Why would it go in the back?

So that doesn't match my reality, does it match yours?

The longest we've kept trash in the truck bed is a couple days - a Pepsi bottle, usually. When I see it, I grab it and put it in the trashcan. I don't wait until 'spring cleaning' time.

I think most Pluggers strips are based on phrases used by the other(elite) 20% of the population and what it means to a hard-working American.

'Spring cleaning' to most people means opening the windows, putting away all the winter things, getting out the summer stuff indoors. And outdoors, it means mowing the yard, planting tulips so stray dogs and cats can knock them over, and trying to stop fleas before they start by keeping the grass short and soaked in poison. (And fertilizer, you want it to grow more? )

But not for pluggers. They spend all summer, fall, and winter throwing fast food junk in the back of their truck, so much that the trashcan is overflowing.

80%?