Friday, February 29, 2008

Friday the 29th

The comic:



You're a plugger if you like dogs?

HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE

Or this is why there are pets that are the same species as their owners - they treat the mentally challenged Pluggers as pets. (And they put collars on the mentally ill and shock them so hard they can only drool.)

HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Thursday the 28th

The comic:

Pluggers are old.

Yes, we know that. We also know that non-Pluggers die from syphilis before they become "old".

Big deal.


No, what's shocking, shocking! about today's glimpse into hell is that there are Plugger teachers.

No! No! No!

Actually, I can think of at least one teacher I had who could have been a Plugger. Everybody hated him, and he taught my friend's mom. (And other "old" people who stayed/returned to the area.)

Pluggers are also immortal.

I think - I'm not googling it, do it yourself if you want the "truth" - that retirement age is 65. So his two students are now 85, making him at least 100! Or if the retirement age is 55, then they're now 75, and he's 90! (I'm assuming most teachers - not grad students! - are about 15-20 years older than their students, especially in elementary and middle schools!)

Oh yah - song du jour. Enjoy!

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Wednesday the 27th

The comic:

The caption and the dialog do not match.

It is the normal type of nonsense one would expect to hear, but it's just odd.

"Foreign policy"? Foreign Pluggers? I know there was a Canadian one, but he's a CCer. He doesn't count!

This would be fine without the dialog! Annoying as usual, but normal...ish.

Dialog... erg...

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Tuesday the 26th

The comic:


Rain does not do an adequate job, hundreds of Pluggers everywhere!

It's called "soap", you ignorant freaks!

Gah!

Calming - a new song (for me at least). It's in Tamil, and it's beautiful.

Monday the 25th

Yesterday and this weekend (and, to be honest, much of today) were filled with procrastination. And self-loathing. And tears. Which is why, despite the need for "urgent" things to do, I couldn't look at this shit. You know how it is. But I feel a bit better today, so hey!

The comic:


I don't like you, Reed Hoover. You're not funny. And you can't be a CCer or other form of snarker, or you would have told somebody. So you think you're funny.

But you're not - you know what comic you're submitting ideas to. Today's is just especially painful.

Animals do shed, no matter how old they are. I've brushed Dixie every year of her life, and there was always part on the brush. (Lots of parts - bigger than some puppies!) It's not new, and it's not funny.

The new is also weird - so Pluggers aren't old, they're aging and dealing with the signs of aging?

It also looks like he's going to try a comb over. ::groan::

Hate, Reed Hoover, hate.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Sunday the 24th

Hey, Pluggers! Guess what I'm listening to! Yeah. Bollywood. Not Dollywood, stupid!

The comic:

Oh, damn! I didn't mean to insult Pluggers on The R's day.

This poor guy bought this car less than a year ago, and it is now worthless. Well, it was a trade.

Poor, poor RhinoMan.

All Pluggers are poor, but RhinoMan is the poorest - so who gets Pluggerville charity? Humans? Their "pets'?

And er, moment of silence for "Michael Melnyk". Even in Pluggerville, you only remember someone when they die. And had a car so bad the Salvation Army didn't want it! (Wait, wasn't that in a Foxworthy book?) My standard "somebody died" song.

::scurries away::

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Saturday the 23rd

The comic:

Watching Malcolm. It's a bit absurd, but still hilarious and less insulting and patronizing than Pluggers, but I guess everything is, except for Mallard Fillmore.

Anyways.

I thought catch and release was about fishing! Dude is fishing. Dude caught a boot (does that really happen?). Dude will soon release the boot.

Or is this about the horrible bad luck of Pluggers? They never catch a fish, they never catch a break, their life sucks.

But they're better than the rest of us, because they never fish for fun, it's for food.

Though why he can't get his bear friend to catch fish the natural way, I'll never know.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Friday the 22nd

The comic:

A classic?

Does that mean this has run before?

I like that it's a guy - hyuk hyuk, guys can't fold maps.

Is he even on a road?

I wonder if he'll make his map into a swan. That would be cool.

I love his tongue out, he's so confused!

Thursday the 21st

The comic:



Yes, Josh has already covered this. But I still have to.

Of course wanted posters in Pluggerville have dogs and cats on them - they're the citizens and potential criminals!

Who calls a lost dog flyer a wanted poster? Pluggers, and by Pluggers I mean Reed Hoover and Brookins.

Non-Plugger electronic technology awesomeness whoring - microchips. The prices are going down, and even if your dog doesn't have a collar, they can scan him and find out where he belongs. Cool, no? All 3 of ours are now cyborgs.

Not that we wouldn't put up flyers.

I don't know what this comic is trying to say - non-Plugger neighborhoods are filled with 'real' wanted posters, like the ones they had in the wild west or at the post office long ago. So Pluggers aren't criminals, and they live in safe neighborhoods. (Or the Pluggers just don't care.)

Not that I've ever seen a wanted poster in any neighborhood, even the 'worst' Memphis ones.

Or is Hoover saying that non-Pluggers don't have dogs or cats? Or that we don't care if they get loose? Or maybe we keep an eye on our babies?

And of course, dogs and cats owning dogs and cats... sure, the argument can be made that Pluggers are humans and their pets are monkeys, but that smacks of evilution!

I just don't know.

Or it's their kids running away...

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Wednesday the 20th

The comic:



Minnesota is so far north! And it has big cities! Why the double plugger attack?

Pluggers like to eat, but they feel guilty about it, so they rename their food.

I'm so glad the RhinoMan's got food to eat - more than just lunch and dinner. He's moving up in the world!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Tuesday the 19th

The comic:



I do like that this could happen - the submitter is from Minnesota, I'm sure he has a fireplace. Cuts his own wood? Maybe, maybe not.

I don't like the rest.

I really don't like the rest.

It sucks.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Monday the 18th

The comic:



So young Pluggers are only content if they're anorexic? (I know, I know, some people look anorexic but aren't, but honestly - you're 18 and your waistline is 18 inches around?)

We've seen young Pluggers before, maybe you can only become a Plugger once you're old, and then you can look back on your life with PluggerVision.

That's better than young Pluggers trying to match their ages and waistlines!


This comic isn't completely disturbing, because hey! RhinoMan's here, and he's happy. Good for him.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Sunday the 17th

The comic:


Dave Brookins of Richmond, Virginia?

Good God.

Onto the comic - ha ha, Pluggers don't need computers and the only Facebook they use is a book... really close to their face... because they can't see.

Er.

What?

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Saturday the 16th

The comic:



Okay. Commercial time.

A Psych marathon would rule. Or an Arrested Development one!

Anyways, I rarely keep still during an hour long show(or I wouldn't be doing this), so I'm not a Plugger.

Yay!

But yeah, lazy.

And they have self-winding watches, whatever those are.

I used to wear an Eeyore watch, but I fiddled with it too much and the clasp thing broke. Now my cell phone is my watch.

Back to Pluggers, before Psych, oops.

This guy's dead, unless it's true that Pluggers can't even be bothered to move their arms while watching TV.

Mummies!

Friday, February 15, 2008

Friday the 15th

The comic:


I'm sure I have my fair share of wire hangers, but I don't go to dry cleaners that often.

So...

Pluggers...

Are...

Old.

::sigh::

But hey - I'm all caught up!

Now how will I put off fixing my English rough draft?

Thursday the 14th

The comic:



GET FUCKED, PLUGGERS.

Wednesday the 13th

The comic:


Newsflash: Pluggers remember things they notice.

I love the look on her face - a mixture of surprise and anger. Like she's been in a cave for the last 10 years ago or something.

Tuesday the 12th

The comic:



How sad.

And disgusting!

Those should be replaced before they reach antique status. I mean, ewwwwww.

But still sad. Look at her face. That towel is too small for anything but her hair, and it's all she has. And it's as old or older than her.

But if Pluggers are cheap enough to hold onto to towels for that long, wouldn't everything in their house be antique? Though I guess antique means 'expensive, elite' and not 'old'.

Because all non-pluggers are craaaaaaaaaaaazy about the antiques.

Monday the 11th

The comic:



I can see this happening.

I mean, he's from California. Probably has good weather most of the year. Uses a clothesline.

But you can't buy a washer that new and call yourself a plugger!

Sunday the 10th

The comic:



MY EYES MY EYES SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP MY EYES

There is something WRONG with that cat!

And I say that as a dog owner!

Jim Stepleton, you are one sick fuck. You and Brookins. ::eugh::

Mousetraps don't "work on cheese", they "work on" springs or glue or poison. (Chocolate and peanut butter are better at first, but after the first few deaths, they wise up.)

Animals are pluggers. An animal is referred to as a mousetrap. It kills other animals. TWISTED.

Also, cats need more than milk to survive.

Those three sets of mouse eyes will haunt me until I die.

...

Or see one of my puppies again.

Saturday the 9th

The comic:


His hands... are... red.

His hands are red because he was doing something he shouldn't. (He's henpecked! O, I slay me.)

Not. Funny. Not. Clever.

As to whether pistachios leave red dust on the hands, I'm in the dark and refuse to turn on any lights. (All the info I need a click away and yet, I don't care.)

Friday the 8th

The comic:



Wow.

Topical.

Ish.

Reed Hoover, are you the dad or the kid (in the '70s or '60s or '40s)? Or did you just come up with this?

A dollar allowance at that age? Today? Weak dollar or no, sheesh.

I don't know if I like how stupid/confused that dad looks - "he wants more? but I only got a dollar!" or something.

Allowance is yet another topic I know little about. My sister and I got weekly allowances sporadically when we were growing up. The first one I remember was tied to chores - do extra, get an extra token in the cup thing, do less or act stupid, get one taken out, and then count them all on friday or saturday or the end of the week.

But they bought us things within reason, and still do, so hey.

A dollar a week won't get you much, you'd have to save for about 2 to 3 months to see a movie! But the weak dollar - doesn't that only apply to exchange rates?

But yeah.

A dollar a week sucks!

Thursday the 7th

The comic:



Oh, that is one pissed off dog-man-beast! "Woman, if you did the damn laundry once in a while, there wouldn't be coffee stains on my shirt!"

This isn't really a plugger version of anything - she is advising him about fashion. (Not that she can talk! No Plugger ever dresses well.)

Wednesday the 6th

The comic:


Uh...

Er...

Have they never heard of indoor plants?

The submitter is from ALABAMA?! It gets gray and miserable around here, but that kind of winter?

Right.

Pluggers like plants.

Ahahahahahahahaha. They're stoned.

Alright!

Tuesday the 5th

The comic:


A classic? I bet it's a classic!

She's more than his hair stylist, though this is a step up from being an inanimate object.

She's doing laundry, maybe she has other plans, and she should just stop and cut your hair? I hope she cuts you or gives you a terrible haircut. You deserve it.

Monday the 4th

The comic:

If I wanted to know more about today's comic, I could call my mom and ask her about the feasibility of making three cups of tea from one tea bag. And how the third cup would taste.

But I don't remember the last time she drank tea. I know she likes sweet tea, I know we've made tea in the past, but it was usually enough for a pitcher, not a cup.

I can, however, talk about something else. A man sent this in, but a woman is drinking the tea. Men drink tea, too, Brookins.

How much do tea bags cost anyway?

Sunday the 3rd

The comic:


Oh God.

So a Plugger's wikipedia is their own knowledge.

But that's not wikipedia. Wikipedia can be edited, changed, updated, debated, changed.

People like the Plugger pictured today never change their mind and don't want to learn new things.

This is just stupid, stupid, stupid! All four of them arguing about something happening might make more sense, but one idiot saying something? That's a blog.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Saturday the 2nd

The comic:



Um.

Wow.

Pluggers don't believe in making reservations and/or honoring the ones they've already made.

Or...

A plugger cares more about their energy level than going to a party? Or out to dinner with their friends or family?

I've never known *getting dressed* to be a big buzzkill. Even getting dressed up!

I wasn't wiped out by dressing up for graduation, and I was in some serious pain.

But also - bathed? That could apply to little kids, or hey - what if they have to be bathed by their human owners? Though that normally wipes me out, Wickett is still full of beans.

Now, this week, I was wiped out from running around and didn't feel that great, so I decided not to go see a movie on campus. I hadn't told anyone I was going, so I am better than this couple.

Which is always good.

And if you know that something as simple as getting dressed is going to wipe you out, maybe you shouldn't make plans that require such strenuous activity!

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Friday the 1st

The comic:



THAT HEAD WILL HAUNT MY DREAMS. AND MY WAKING MOMENTS. BURN THE MONSTER!

::ahem::

When I saw this image, I was quite confused - that Plugger appears to be a white collar worker, an office drone. Pluggers are drones, but they don't wear ties to work!

At first glance, I didn't quite get the caption either - I was like what is a 'driving'?

Also, the pocket is big enough to hold the cases, not just the glasses! I don't think I've ever worn a shirt with a pocket big enough to survive a day with one glasses case, let alone 3 or 4.

Except a guy's shirt that was too big, of course. And my coats.

This is just odd - Pluggers have terrible vision, but cannot combine their glasses in any way - bifocals with the tinting would cover near and far sighted issues, along with the sun! So there go the reading and driving glasses. (I'm nearsighted, and have never carried more than one pair with me. I don't even bother with sunglasses. So I have no idea what's going on.)

Do people need different glasses for reading text on different surfaces? Really?

Okay, so what is the "Pluggers are the best" message here?

They're simple folk, they like their glasses to serve one purpose and one purpose only! And they're always prepared, with all four glasses on their person. Much better than the rest of us, who keep specialized glasses near where we'd use them. (I guess. I wouldn't know.)

But honestly - how much reading do Pluggers do? I know they're old, and all old people need glasses to read, but Pluggers aren't too fond of book learnin'.

And computers? Pluggers? If you need glasses for computer use, would you just buy another pair of reading ones and keep them at work? Or get another one for home use?

Are any of these prescription? Is he wearing the prescription pair? And he's so "thrifty", he can't read a book, drive, make sense of the squiggles on the computer screen, or protect his eyes from the sun, since function costs more?

I'm lost.

When I first got glasses, I loved the case my glasses came in. However, it was a hard shell, to protect the glasses from shattering or bending. So the case wouldn't fit in a shirt pocket by itself, let alone with two others!

Charitable idea - Mary is not a Plugger, and she was inspired by a male relative/friend/coworker.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Thursday the 31st

The comic:



This is not an original joke.

Yes, what used to be number one is now in regular rotation on the oldies station.

It happens - we age! Time moves.

And I love the Doors.

I like that this a classic - maybe he was writing about some '40s swing tune.


I've never heard elevator music - I guess the music at stores counts - an adult contemporary (soft rock) station here, some oldies there, whatever.

Popular music changes, it's not the end of the world.



I still can't see a Plugger listening to the Doors when Jim Morrison was alive.

Wednesday the 30th

The comic:



The punning, the punning - make it stop!

I just know that Mindy Sue heard someone say this and wrote this in, oh, she didn't realize she made a pun! Or she said it and somebody with a similar sense of humor pointed out the possible meanings of the words.

Either way, gag me. First way, Mindy Sue gets to be smugger than the second.

So Pluggers are poor, but they know how to handle their money.

So why do they go to "money markets"?

I guess in the bad old days, it was cheaper to make your own bread than to buy it, but not these days. Homemade bread is not an every day, hell, every month occurrence at our house - and I know how to use the breadmachine!

I only hope Mindy Sue can make some money with her puns. Does Reader's Digest still suck?

Tuesday the 29th

The comic:



I saw this one and thought about commenting on it on the 29th, but I couldn't. That's it - I haven't seen any since then. (I'm not adding Pluggers to my daily Houston Chron page!)

Josh already covered this, but I can't get his site to load right now. He was funnier than I ever could be, but hey! My blog is all Pluggers, all the time.

Or something.


Anyways, we've all seen the amazing Simpsons episode that inspired Chris Petersen (or Brookins, if Petersen didn't specify what he was pawning).

Hank Hill is crazy - "Savor the aroma of the beer"? Ew, ew, ew! Beer smells "like sick", Bobby, yes it does. (Oh, this statement amuses my mom to no end.)

Pluggers!

Depressing if the Plugger used to use a non-Plugger money market and has sunk to pawning off his childhood/his kid's saxophone.

Or as cockily Plugged as ever, watching the economy tank and laugh laugh because pawn shops won't be affected in a way that would bother him. He heard the term on the teevee and interpreted it as he saw fit.

I like the second one, I get to bash Pluggers and not feel sorry for them. That's good.

Friday, February 8, 2008

Wow, it's February.

I have a rough draft due Monday at 9:10am, and I have the outline and questioned answered from the workshop today. (Everything important I'd already covered in my outline - which sucks, but it's mine and I know what I'm doing.)

But no, I'm going to read for thirty minutes, and watch the new episode of Psych. (Las Vegas and Psych are on at the same time.)

Then sleep.

I am wiped out.

Last week didn't go as well as I thought it would, despite the auspicious start. (Can't go wrong with RhinoMan!)

Tuesday, we had some ferocious wind and 2 trees got knocked over on campus and my dorm lost power, except for the generator, so everything in the surge protector (my fridge and clock) still worked, and the lights flickered.

The temperature dropped after that. Thursday, I started coughing in my last class, and ended the day exhausted. I ended up turning in my English paper as I'd written it Monday night Friday morning, then dragging myself to the campus clinic.

They didn't have their lab... people or things, but hey, I had a real fever! (My normal is 97 and change, and it was 100 and change. ::nods::)

And the flu. The Tamiflu worked, I was functioning on Monday.

I threw up 3 times that day, and nobody cleaned it up or took care of me. :( (Becky didn't want me home, I'd get everyone sick, wah wah.)

Saturday was a sleepy non-barfing blur, broken up by my mom bringing goodies. These throat lozenges worked wonders, I could talk like that! Wow! Super Bowl Sunday, I felt a bit better, but still dragged around, which did not help when I did my laundry.

This week? Not so bad. But not perfect.

Monday and Tuesday were unbelievably hot. At least inside the classrooms. And dorms. And... everything with walls. The wind was nice, at least. Monday morning, I was going to wear tennis shoes and long pants, but no, too hot. Flipflops and shorts and a tank top. And no jacket. Somebody made a catty comment along the lines of "it's not that hot," but hey, my last class was a sauna.

And I wasn't only the one who thought so - I turned off my fan and oh no, why'd you do that? Bit of fun.

Monday afternoon, the fire alarm went off. Tuesday, the campus shut down. I went to a doctor appointment. It rained. We left. It rained and our stomachs beat the sirens and thunder in noise. We ate a terrible place, Danver's, but we ate inside the place, no moving vehicles. We went to Walgreen's. We drove up to the dorm from the East, and there were lights on.

Me: We have power!

We turned into the visitor lot (too cheap/lazy to get a parking tag and the general lots are too far away) and saw the other light. The blinking light. And heard the alarm. And saw the people.

Me: Keep driving!

The fire alarm went off. So everyone had to leave the building, so they wouldn't be consumed in an inferno.

But because the university didn't want to lose them to Oz U (I had yet to leave the vehicle - it was dry), everyone was moved to another building.

The cops showed up. The firetrucks showed up.

It took a lot longer than usual for people to be allowed back in the building. I waited it out in the car.

It was an odd night. I kept my window open, I heard the sirens, but none were directly overhead. We were told to go to the basement, or first 3 floor hallways. However, it was a suggestion, so I merely stuck my head out before returning to the window.

I watched the Daily Show and Colbert Report and went to sleep. No problems, except for a few minutes beeped out by the news that there was severe weather in the area.


So yeah.

Excuses, excuses.

But no promises, except one - I will not skip a single comic.

I will start again with Tuesday, January 29th.

Hopefully before January '09.

That is all, Psych is on soon, and Monk is on now and he's awesome.

Especially when compared to a Plugger.

Disclaimer

The comic is reproduced here for purposes of review only, and all rights remain with the creator, Gary Brookins.