My first college class is in less than 2 hours!

I have 3 classes today and my first day of work, which starts with a 100 question test! Don't know if I'll be better off passing or failing that...

Onto some people who've never known this anxiety beyond fifth grade, today's Plugger.



Studley?

This isn't too odd - I've got a crazy little stomach that needs fiber as well - but what makes this special is the look of concentration on his face.

He had too many real cocktails at any hours...

This one makes no sense!

Not with yesterday's in mind.

Today's comic:



Do businesses still have tabs? I thought that went out with credit cards.

I like that there's no credit here. Makes it that much more confusing.

Sorry this is late...

I was going to do this in the morning, but I didn't look at it.

It wouldn't have made any difference if I had.

Today's comic confuses me.



I thought Pluggers drove pickups.

I just don't know what to say about this.

I think Brookins needs to take a good look at cars - that vehicle is as tall as an SUV, but doesn't look it.

I'm in my dorm room

on my laptop!


Today's comic -



This is the funniest Pluggers ever!

The content isn't that funny, but content + date?

I suspected that Pluggers weren't the college type, I was even going to say something before looking at the comic, but damn!

I'm watching Malcolm in the Middle right now.

Followed by King of the Hill.

Much funnier - even the worst episodes of the Simpsons are funnier than Pluggers.

I wish Pluggers was big enough to warrant a mention in MAD. Mallard Fillmore and They'll Do It Every Time hasn't been mentioned either, along with Gil Thorp.

So sad.

Onto something sadder, today's comic.

Who has said that extinction is not forever? That's the first thing that makes no sense.

The second? A bald animal head, with hair on the rest of the body - mange doesn't just mimic male pattern baldness.

He looks so despondent, that hair must have really mattered to him and his happiness. It must have been magical hair, to make up for the ugliness, of course.

Hair doesn't go extinct, it falls out and stops growing, I think, most of the men in my family have a good head of hair, so I don't know.

And the dogs all have hair, even though it has been cut short for summer.

I'm saying this involves a Plugged-up common phrase, because it seems like that's the intent.

Not that I've ever heard of extinction being reversed - endangered animals, yes, but not one completely wiped out. Besides Jurassic Park, of course, something I've never seen.

So we're all technically Pluggers - we know that when the last of a species of plant or animal dies out, it's gone forever.

But who describes hair loss as extinction?

Besides Lloyd DeRamus of Buies Creek, North Carolina. Perhaps this has a creationism vs. evolution undercurrent? Or about climate change.

I don't want to know, and it won't make a difference.

The next one will be done on my laptop... in my dorm room... at school!

I hoped Blogger would be down all day...

Then I wouldn't have to look at today's comic today.



See what I mean?

Okay, this is obviously a Plugger version of something else.

And makeup done by little children can be extreme.

But I thought makeover shows were for the average, salt-of-the-earth, blue collar American - watching or starring.

Not that I'd ever willingly watch a makeover show. I'll read the MAD parody. They did the extreme home makeover, and the person who was having his home redone had a comically tragic life - he's only a head in a jar. Pluggers are that pathetic!

Something sinister - there must be some way to corrupt this -

That little girl is like Amelia Bedelia, she thought that dressing food for cooking (preparing it, I guess, I remember my Amelia Bedelia books, but not how to cook) meant putting makeup and clothes on it. Amelia Bedelia put a turkey in a cute little outfit, as I recall.

So that's why they're not on an extreme makeover show - would you put the Sawney Beane family on any show but Fear Factor?




Friday's comic will be attacked on my laptop in my dorm room! On Friday? Maybe...

Pluggers are stupider than ever.

But the Daily Show and Colbert Report are funnier than ever!

Rob Riggle in Iraq - The End by the Doors was playing as he entered Iraq, then stopped, and How Bizarre by OMC started playing on his ipod. Awesome!

On to today's comic.



Caviar is fish eggs! An animal product! An expensive, disgusting (so I've heard) animal product!

My sister won't eat it, she's a vegetarian now. She'd eat Plugger Caviar, if she liked blackberry preserves on saltine crackers. That just sounds gross. Preserves and jams belong on non-salty bread, not crackers. Crackers (expensive ones, but crackers nonetheless) hold caviar.

So he's putting a black jelly-like food on a cracker.

He doesn't know what caviar is. He can't!

Also, remember Selma in the episode where she married Sideshow Bob? She couldn't taste or smell anything. Clearly, this Plugger (and many others) have also shot bottle rockets accidentally up their noses.

So the texture is similar to caviar, and he can pretend to be rude.

Sad...

...der than usual.

I'm watching "Millionaire Trailer Parks" on the Travel Channel

Will that affect how I view today's comic?

Haven't seen it yet, so who knows.

Well yes, because people that live in these trailers buy makeup and go to steam things and get real facials.

But so do most people.

Okay, lady pluggers want facials, but can't afford them because they have to iron all day and night to make enough money to pay for the water in the iron. Isn't there more to a facial than steam - like goop? And she has fur, wet fur stinks. She's crazy.

Whatever.

What's actually wrong with this comic - she's wearing glasses! No, you do not wear glasses around steam. I've learned that by opening the dishwasher as soon as it's done. "I can't see!"

She's crazier than most of them.

That shirt was on a body when she started.

Finally, an appropriate Pluggers.

It's Sunday.

They're in church.

Wow.

Not that it makes a bit of sense.

Who uses the phrase "Question of the Hour"?

Church lasted longer than an hour, to my memory. (Easter '04)

No one in my immediate family has the patience or maturity for church - even my mother, who is, legally, an adult. And has a child that is legally an adult. (Me. Eek!)

She signed to my sister (neither deaf) and passed notes to her friend.

This is better than this comic and church, even if it makes me cry. So's this one.

Pluggers know how to drive.

I don't.

How sad.

Today's comic.



So, why is he buying a new old car?

He doesn't look 16.

So... did his crappy car die?

I doubt this cheapskate would buy a new car for the sake of buying a new car. We got our truck on a whim in late 2001/early 2002 (license plate says Feb 02) after an oil change or whatever for our car.

Plus the truck is better for camping, and we went camping 4 times in 2001 with the car.

But why is the Plugger buying one now? If it's for a new driver, where is he or she (he, probably)?

Doesn't he have his own used car?

Plus, even if Pluggers only buy American, used American doesn't help fight the terrorists.

For shame.

Not getting on the computer

does not make this vanish.

I wish it were so. This is a lesson I should keep in mind when school starts on the 27th, isn't it?


This is so much easier.


Yesterday's mess - and I did look at it yesterday, while the sun was up.

I do not do this!

I meet new people, we start comparing war stories, sometimes it comes up! It happens.

Actually, I'm not that fond of making new friends in general. I feel I made friends at frosh camp, but not like want to hang out friends, more like a friendly face when I need it... I like to be alone.

Would explain the whole computer thing...

As for the Pluggers, these are adults, they need help.

I have a scar at the base of my neck and it does not look like a worm!

Top that.

Today's.

Hehe, that would be awesome if it was twisted in a horrible way. I think I could do it with paint, nothing special.

We taught my cousin to say she wanted to be on the Jerry Springer show when she was 3, along with indoctrinating her against Agent Doggett ("Ugly Doggy" indeed).

The Pluggers? Gag me with a fork.

Way to pander to your base, Brookins! Why is the kid calling his grandfather papa? Where's his daddy, huh? Granddads are Pop-Pop, not papa.

Or so I've heard.


I should do all of these at 1 in the morning when I should be sleeping, they're not funnier, but I think I am.

Pluggers 101

You can only skip a day if you don't even look at that day's comic.

And I really didn't look at it.

But maybe I'd get more comments if I did look at it every day.

Hmm.

Yesterday's -



I have one fancy dress and one pair of fancy shoes. I wore them to this classical music thing in Portland last spring and to my graduation last May.

However, the shoes and dress are comfortable, fit me, and look good.

So, like many people who are comfortable in non-formal wear, I only have one fancy, dressy er, dress.

But in 4 years, when I'll be looking for a real job, I will branch out into work clothes.

As for today's Plugger, this actually fits into the comic's description. These are hard working people who have blue collar jobs.

You don't wear suits to blue collar jobs.

However, you'd think they make enough to buy a comfortable one when the occasion arises.

That jacket looks like a hand-me-down from someone shorter than him. It's the only part that doesn't fit, which doesn't make sense. The description makes you think he gains weight between suit days, but the picture doesn't match that. The shirt and pants seem to fit his Plugger physique, but not the jacket.

I've never heard of arms getting longer and fatter independent of the rest of the body, but this is a Plugger.

Plus - he's a guy! He doesn't have to button his suit jacket! Unless he's a defense attorney in court on Law and Order - next time you watch an episode of L & O or SVU, with a trial, watch the defense lawyer.

Today's -


I don't have bifocals, I'm merely nearsighted.

And I don't have to shave my face, but if I did, I'd have to wear my glasses. You ever try on new frames when you need new lenses? Those frames are either empty or have plain glass. So how can you tell if they look good? You just guess. I did well last time, I like this pair.

So everyone with poor vision is a Plugger today. I urge you to not get the surgery for this reason - we can tough this out.

Or this just means Pluggers won't wear contacts, if they make bifocal contacts. I won't wear contacts. The devil's lens, I call 'em! (I'm chicken and I really like my glasses.)

I think this is my 100th post.

It is.

Yeah, yeah, whatever.

I almost looked at Sunday's comic on Sunday, but couldn't bring myself to do so.

Yesterday, it was so hot, I walked for five-ten minutes. (So very hot.) "Wear shoes!" sez the Mom. "Of course," sez I.

The shoes are as hot as the cement and asphalt I'm not walking on. Either they're too thin or they're reflecting the sunlight back up into the soles of my feet. (Black flip-flops.) It happened on July 24th, and I was on grass, not a sidewalk. This is the first time my shoes have ever been that kind of hot.

That counts as an excuse, right? I got up after the sun, it's only 5am right now, not very hot.


Sunday:



Wow.

A cell phone.

He's in a pickup truck - and he's using a cell phone line! ha ha ha ha

I think I've seen that name and location before...

I'm not sure I understand the "joke" here - Pluggers don't date strangers, just their relatives and pets?

That truck looks both too big and too small. He can't fit inside of it - unless he gets terrible reception inside the cab. But still, the size is off.

Monday:



I don't drink coffee, and I never will!

I win!

This name seems familiar as well.

I also don't get this - why leave the spoon in? The closest I come to coffee (as in using a coffee cup) is hot cocoa, and you stir the cocoa with a spoon, then take the spoon out to drink and burn your tongue.

Mmm, I can't wait until it's cold enough for that to feel good.

Turns out that wasn't my 100th post.

Drafts show up in the count I see, and every time I go to start one, look at the comic (like yesterday) and throw up, there's a blank draft added to my post count - for me.

Unless there are more beyond the first page in edit posts, this is my 99th.

And I won't be doing a thing from my laptop until the 23rd or 24th - we don't have wireless routers here, and what's the fun of hooking it up to the modem this computer's plugged in to - one internet will be easy on me, I'm a computer idiot. If there are free classes somewhere on or around campus, sign me up.

And it's my BIRTHDAY! NINETEEN, baby.

Almost 2 decades. Yes, today's adults were born... in the late '80s!

That's why I'm the perfect person to judge Pluggers.

Yesterday's hurt my head, but I'm braver, stronger now.

I understand that this is a common problem, not that I've seen my mom struggle with it - she looks at her account online, and keeps up with the ledger. As did I, when I had one and used it regularly. As I will, in college.

But it's a big step, admitting the existence of Sudoku more than once, so I don't expect Pluggers to understand computers or calculators.

But... where are there monthly Sudoku challenges? You can find a different one for each hour...

Maybe Reader's Digest (ecch) has one, and that's the only monthly magazine these simple idiots get.

I hate Sudoku being abused by Pluggers, and I've never mastered it. And I call it Soduku in my head a lot.


Today's sucks just as much:


More interspecies lovin'!

All I have to say is... ew... wet fur...

And yes, they're poor. WE GET IT.

How do they fit in that thing?

Inflatable pools can be a bitch, we had a long rectangular one for years, it was pretty big, as pools like that go, but not very deep. We got a round plastic one for the dogs a couple years back, they ignored it.

Now, I wish we had a pool. But a sprinkler below the trampoline was just as fun.

But what they have is a travesty, an abomination unto the pool gods.

Why? They're pluggers.

With the 100+ heat we've been having, I'm going to assume that they're going to be boiled alive after being knocked out with the heavy end of a tranquilizer gun. (The tranquilizer would taint the meat.)

By who?

Their math challenged neighbors, of course.

My 100th post!

My 101st will be posted from my birthday present - my laptop!

As for the centennial, I felt there was too much pressure yesterday, plus the comic kind of... what's the word... sucked. Probably. If I even looked at it.

Oh well, let's go to yesterday, the day I got... a laptop! (Birthday's not until Saturday, there's still time!)

You know, there were hearing aids in the days before batteries, so you don't have to abandon your Luddite ways to still listen as you age.

Unless they can't afford even the old tin horn thing...

The best part about this - I thought she was knitting at first, but she's holding a calendar that has no pictures above the months. And she has nothing better to do than write down chores for her retiree husband! They both need help.


And today's.

What the hell does that mean?

There are no Plugger pilots?

Most people never 'file a flight plan' while flying kites, most people (especially me) have no idea what a flight plan is!

So this was sent in by a former pilot who's an old fart now and flies kites and uses aviation related words while spending time with his grandchildren?

Pluggers are messed up. Senior Pluggers are f!cked up.

I refuse to work on Sunday.

One the grounds that, um, there was a Law and Order: SVU marathon on USA yesterday and I love Munch.

See? An excuse.

There's no excuse for Sunday's comic, of course.


That hunk of junk cost thirty grand?

Garages scare me. I'd rather have a carport - a cover to protect the car from the sun, but with it open, so I won't be scared. I blame the "M TV" for my fear of garages.

I refuse to believe anything a Plugger owns is worth anything in the real world.

That drawing of a vehicle looks like it won't fit in the drawing of a garage - the garage doesn't look deep enough to hold a motorcycle.

I can't think of a tag for this, besides stupid.

But that applies all the time.

Or today's.



I thought you were supposed to do that on a bike.

And wear a helmet.

I'll be quiet now.

This can be easily categorized - Pluggers are old, ha ha ha.

I assume there was a time when "high fives" were strange and mysterious, probably when this strip started.

Kudos for making his hand high in the air.

My mom does this all the time, only she's waving at friends.

Wow!

Somebody broke down the demographics of Pluggers and They'll Do It Every Time.

That took a lot of work and dedication, and he promises to continually update it.

Yeah, right.

I'm just grateful that I don't have to do it, not that I was going to do it, just note it along with the analysis of the comic to see how fucking odd it is.

It's pretty cool: check it out.

I got up too early.

Or today's comic is even crazier than usual.




Wha?

Is an 'attitude adjustment' a crazy elitist liberal thing, and real Pluggers don't bother with thinking about their moods and feelings until they've killed themselves because their depression spiraled out of control?

These people have problems. And since caffeine is in fact a drug, the irritability you see in steady drinkers before their morning cup can be withdrawal symptoms.

I haven't touched a caffeinated drink in years, and I can be wide awake in the morning, whether I want to be up or not. A bit slow, but if I've got things I need to do, I'm up.

Magazines have coupons?

In Pluggerville, they do. At least for the purpose of today's comic.
Guys read magazines too!

And what magazines has coupons? Most have contests, yes, that have deadlines, but that's all I can think of. Of course, I only subscribe to MAD, so maybe the boring magazines with recipes and old people things have coupons. But I doubt it. I've flipped through many magazines in my life and never seen coupons!

The newspaper, now.

And how do you get that behind on your magazines? Unless it's National Geographic (no coupons that I'm aware of), they don't take long to read!

This Plugger had a subscription to magazines before she knew how to read, so other Pluggers wouldn't figure out that she was illiterate. (Not a functioning one, though.)

I am so early...

Here is today's comic: (I'm running out of semi-witty intros)



from prolonged exposure to this "comic".

Especially today's.

I didn't find the 'slot for used razor blades' for a while, and now I think I see it. If a medicine cabinet behind a mirror hangs flush on the wall, where do the blades go?

I refuse to say more about another "Pluggers are old and/or refuse to enter the 21st century until the 22nd is almost over" entry.

It's August already.

How did that happen?

Today's comic doesn't really address all that is August when it comes to the topic...



Smart people don't bother to water the yard or the outdoor flowers this late in summer - they just die, you just run up your water bill when you should be inside, letting it die.

Of course he's disgruntled! By the time a teenager gets out of bed during the summer, it is hot.

And his parents (or the people holding him hostage) are too cheap to buy a sprinkler!

Now I realize a sprinkler system may cost a bit more - sprinklers that pop up at a certain time, blah blah... I don't know anyone who has one of those...

But a sprinkler? Attached to the hose?

That's out of a Plugger's league?

Whatever.