Saturday January 30th

The comic:


Are those his teeth?

This is just disturbing!

And wouldn't he have dentures by now?

Ew, I'm out of here! The possibilities are endless, but almost everything I think of for dirty teeth (especially down here) would get your beard a little dirty. My dad smoked and part of his mustache turned yellow.

And since when are they so prissy? Does he bleach it? Metrosexual! (Dated word, dated comic.)

Friday January 29th

The comic:


I'm surprised they get reception in there.

I don't have much to say - I do this with my mom all the time.

I'm quite surprised Pluggers do this, it's a bit 21st century for them, isn't it?

But "mainly," so they don't use it for other things, like calling a tow truck when their car dies or making their children touch base by phone. (We no longer have a landline, so everything is done on the cell phone.)

So since they "mainly" use their phones as walkie talkies while shopping, they're better than the rest of us.

And of course, they're at a Sam's Club/Costco type store. Those stores were fun - so many samples! But now you need a membership to get in the door! Eff that.

Thursday January 28th

The comic:


The Plugger knows how to surf the web? Duuuuuuuuude, freak me out! Or they call their grandkids and ask them to do it, which is no fun. (Click there, where I'm pointing! God, I'll do it myself!)

Pluggers are hypochondriacs. Pluggers have the money and knowledge to use the internet and the money to go to a doctor.

Wow.

Pluggers are elite!

I have chronic pain and I have had other illnesses since I was 13. (Thyroid. It's now out, and I have to take medication everyday or die.) I refuse to look medical stuff up online. If I have a concern, I talk to a professional either over the phone or in the office/pharmacy. The internet can be helpful if you're not prone to hypochondria or are relatively healthy, but when it's ongoing, eff that nonsense. Besides, according to WebMD, I should be dead!

Wednesday January 27th

The comic:


The Steelers aren't going to the Super Bowl, way to be timely!

I can't talk - my more expensive clothing ends up in the back of my closet, passed over for comfy favorites (yes it's 50% hole, but I love it! No!!! The washing machine destroyed it!).

But no NFL stuff, as much as I enjoy watching the game with my mom. (Not by myself, with my mom. Sports are meant to be enjoyed together, because they're really effing boring when you're alone and don't bet.)

Tuesday January 26th

The comic:


I have no idea what that sentence means.

You invest in your hair? So when you go bald, all the money you sank into it as a '50s greaser or '70s (or '80s) Disco King is now worthless?

I just don't get it.

And you don't debate price when they've got the scissors by your head! I've always paid after.

Plus, his glasses should not be on, and if he's got so little hair that his glasses won't get dirty, what is he doing getting a haircut?

I am just lost.

And the animal thing is just so weird! Especially since he's a dog, and I know that dog haircuts cost a lot, no matter how old they are. Does he have mange? Isn't that contagious? Should he even be at the barbershop?

Monday January 25th

The comic:


He's talking to the car.

Purple duct tape FOREVER!

Also, Pluggers are easily amused. And does that mean the car is a former military car? I mean, any shade of "olive", especially "drab" screams military.

And what is up with Pluggerville Hardware having non gray duct tape? Freaky, dude.

Saturday January 23rd

The comic:


You're a Plugger if your kids don't know basic (American) history.

That is sad.

And struggling out of a comfy chair sucks, so stay there, nice and comfy and warm, pretending this comic never happened. (We were spared the creator of the depression, give thanks.)

Friday January 22nd

The comic:


Painted hubcaps are awesome.

I assume they only exist for decorative purposes.

Since Pluggers are selfish jerks, I assume she's not "Oh no!"ing about the potential damage the cap will cause, but because it has a bumper sticker on it.

Also - that's a dashed line. You don't cross those.

No wait, most lines are solid...

I am so not a driver, and a week on campus (with two expeditions by car) has left me lost.

I also thought she was on the wrong side of the car (too much Bollywood).

It's my sister's birthday! She's been driving haphazardly for 3-4 years now and has never lost a hubcap. Go Becky!

Thursday January 21st

The comic:


But I would think a female Plugger in charge of such things would be, you know, fussy, and love to decorate everything come Christmas time, matchy matchy! So these would be stored, not used callously throughout the year!

Also, new hand towels? I know the last time somebody in my family bought a hand towel - August or September 2007, when I moved into the dorm. Unfortunately, I soon learned that I could have spent one dollar instead of ten. But I still have it, so that's something.

And that is one scary looking Rudolph.

(The best post-holiday bargains are on candy, duh!)

Wednesday January 20th

The comic:


You're a Plugger if you're old.

Or you're a Plugger if you've lived more than a certain number of years (this day in history could be as far away as 100 years and as close as 10).

Pluggers live.

Through events.

True story.

Makes you think.

About why anyone would publish this waste of ink and energy and money and gah! (I'm sure I'd be angrier if I personally knew a comic writer struggling to get papers, or if I read the newspaper instead of reading all the comics I want every day thanks to the magical TV with the typrewriter.)

Tuesday January 19th

The comic:



Ha! Pluggers are fat and old and that makes them worry!

Isn't that the funniest damn thing you've ever seen?

No?

What's wrong with you?

Oh, it's not supposed to be funny - it's supposed to be heartwarming, like the Family Circus.

Well, my funny bone hasn't been tickled and my cold evil heart is still cold.

So what purpose does this serve? Yeah, I love being reminded of my weight and age - oh and there's my real name! (presumably)

What the fuck, Pluggers. This is just... weird.

And by weird, I mean weird by Pluggers standards, not you know, reality.

And I just thought of the reason this was published - smugness. Ha, I may be over 50, but my belt size sure isn't! Smugness for the Plugger readership, or smugness from the author - either way, stay classy, Pluggers.

Monday January 18th

The comic:


You know, I'm a liberal elitist but not a vegetarian and I've never had anything called "surf and turf." I know it refers to steak and ... some kind of seafood in the same meal, but I hate steak.

I like fried spam sometimes, and I love me some tuna (but let me make it, you don't know how!), but spam and tuna together? Barf city!

But hey - RhinoMan can afford both tuna and spam - not to mention bread! 2010 is starting nicely for him.

Saturday January 16th

The comic:


Ew ew ew!

Enjoy your weekend!

Friday January 15th

The comic:


Fishers exaggerate.

So all fishers are Pluggers - or at least those who get in a boat and do it often enough to have "it was th-----is long" tall tales.

Not a sad thing for me, since fishing bores me silly.

Thursday January 14th

The comic:


Wow, Pluggers live long lives and/or have kids young.

And you know which one's the kid because his belly is smaller.

When do senior discounts kick in, anyway? I don't mean Medicare or retirement, I mean the local fried food place offering discounts - 55? 60?

And who offers senior discounts these days besides theatres?

So Pluggers and their spawn will live forever. What a cheery thought to start the semester with!

Wednesday January 13th

The comic:


Uh... that's pretty sad.

Tuesday January 12th

The comic:


Pluggers don't need no gubmint in their medicine! Now, where did I put my Medicare check?

Or are Pluggers realists? Or just cheap? (Nah, if they were cheap, they'd read the paper at the library.)

And notice how scared he is? He's had to do many newspaper "treatments" and "cures" and he doesn't know if he'll survive this one.

Monday January 11th

The comic:


Good for him.

(There are fashion trends for cars? This was sent in by a man from Texas, and we all know Pluggers are walking stereotypes, so he would know about that.)

I'm surprised his car looks that good - previous car days have showed decrepit POSs running on a whim and a prayer.

Of course, it merely looks good, that doesn't mean it can move on its own.

Saturday January 9th

The comic:


Why is he holding her purse? I've never understood this gag, because most places women can go, their purses can also go.

Help?

Friday January 8th

The comic:


So is it an outhouse or a shack over another hole in the ice? (I saw that on "That '70s Show.")

But they're furry animals... this is disturbing in many ways, but no visible Pluggers, so happy Friday!

Thursday January 7th

The comic:

So do I! Well not the first step, usually after I burst into my room, I forget why I went up there and go downstairs and then go back up and back down until I ask my mom if she knows what I'm looking for.

But I'm not a male, so I'm not a Plugger! Truly, an occasion for celebration.

Wednesday January 6th

The comic:


I don't need a seat warmer, I need a seat cooler. I'd rather freeze than burn my skin. But that's me.

Isn't that kind of dangerous, to leave your dog unattended in extreme temps in the car? And what now, the dog is going with her? Is it her kid?

Are cold car seats really a problem?

Tuesday January 5th

The comic:


Like... paper? Money?

(Since it's RhinoMan, we can assume it's money he got through a pawn shop or by selling bodily fluids and/or parts.)

This makes no effing sense. Pluggers are packrats? (female) Pluggers don't carry purses? What the hell?

Monday January 4th

The comic:


And then there were papercuts! I like the kind that are like stickers.

Is 2010 the year Pluggers finally admit the "modern" world isn't all that bad?

Saturday January 2nd

The comic:

And yet, they seek out information that will make them angry and confused. (Also - a printed guide to the games?)

Pluggers make no sense.

And we called the Rose Bowl the Rose Bowl, even if we didn't watch it.

Pluggers hate capitalism. Yup.

Friday January 1st

The comic:


That's it, set the bar low!

My resolution for 2010 is to watch more Bollywood.

And possibly update this on a more regular basis. (I just wasn't in the mood for the countdown and I had surgery on Wednesday and whine whine whine.)

Happy 2010! 2000 wasn't the future, but surely 2010 will be!

Friday December 18th

The comic:


Pluggers will use anything as an excuse to be lazy.

Thursday December 17th

The comic:



Too bad I had to sell the family for gas money! Just you and me, ol' girl.

Wednesday December 16th

The comic:


What?

They only have pictures of their kids when they were young?

Man, Pluggers like to wrap nothing in some confusing phrases.

Plus, the pictures of my mom as a toddler look nothing like the pictures of me as a toddler - they don't even feel the same sometimes. Time to get your eyes checked!

Tuesday December 15th

The comic:

Well, if you have a Plugger delivering your mail, you never have to worry about him reading them - but how does he know where to deliver it?

Oh, you mean that Pluggers aren't elitist snobs who go to college. Fuck you very much, I am incredibly depressed and anxious just trying to keep my head above water this semester (which will be over tomorrow... I hope) and just shut up. College isn't easy.

Wednesday December 9th

The comic:


People without children or grandchildren - people who are too young for grandchildren - have chronic health problems. You FAIL, pluggers.

Plus, who keeps them on the fridge? We write the dates down in at least 2 calendars (a wall calendar and a "weekly planner" type) and keep the appointment cards in the car.

And how dare they mention my sister's birthday? Eek, I hope I don't have an appointment on her birthday. That's only happened once.

Tuesday December 8th

The comic:


I'm somewhat smaller than a rhinoceros and my dog is bigger than the one in the drawing.

She doesn't like me resting my feet on her. Unless I'm using my feet to give her a belly rub.

So basically... this is wrong. Because my personal experience is just as valid as Greg Wilson's. And he's in Oregon, the elitist! I'm in Tennessee, where the real people are.

Monday December 7th

The comic:


Commies! UPS and FedEx exist for a reason, man. *Glenn Beck tears*

Luddites - but that's par for the course. And I looooooooove getting mail, because look, I'm important! I'm a grown-up! (A card for my 5th birthday party addressed to ME, not my mom.)

Saturday December 5th

The comic:


Pluggers name their POS cars.

Ha?

I wonder if he got paid by Ford for this. (Ford is all American and they've got Mike Rowe!) I say the drawing is bad - and it is - but I can't draw this well. Think xkcd, but without that level of skill. (Straight lines are beyond me, even with a guide.)

Friday December 4th

The comic:


How can he afford a coffee maker? Or the electricity to run it? I am confused.

Thursday December 3rd

The comic:


Ha! Babies throw food. And dogs eat food of the floor, saving the mom about .5 minutes of cleaning. It's so funny!

Does anyone actually use a vacuum on food? That sounds like a recipe (ha!) for a busted vacuum, especially with wet food.

Wednesday December 2nd

The comic:

And if your grandkids call you "Grammy." What do they call Grandpa? "Grappy?"

What the hell.

Tuesday December 1st

The comic:



Ooh, new logo for the "classics"!

All Pluggers drive, and all Pluggers work from their cars. No Plugger works in an office. Wow. 80% of Americans work in their cars.

What a waste of a comic strip. What a waste of money.

It's so blah.

Monday November 30th

The comic:


Pluggers have memory problems. Isn't that hilarious?

Or is it sweet?

I'm not sure. (I was going to say I forget, but that seems beneath me.)

Basically, what is the point?

Saturday November 28th

The comic:


This is sweet.

Swinging is so much fun, except most swings are meant to be used before puberty hits.

I like the idea of "grown-ups" playing. Maturity is optional.

Friday November 27th

The comic:

Man, those Pluggers are wild! Hand-holding! In the park!

I have the vapors.

Wednesday November 25th

The comic:



First, this gag is older than me.

Second, I refuse to believe a Plugger, even a young one full of sass, is allowed to want things like that.

Third, ignore the second, because somebody thinks RhinoMan looks rich.

Fourth - "jean look" ??? Isn't the distressed look - does RhinoMan look like a pair of jeans?

Tuesday November 24th

No, I'm not better yet, but I had a procedure today and I'm just killing time til I stop being kind of lazy and put a movie on. It wasn't kidney stones, just my chronic pain condition acting up. It still hurts to walk more than a few feet, but hey, I'm starting new medication!

But you don't care about me, you care about Pluggers. You're weird.

The comic:



Pluggers plan things out and then leave the things for the plans at home.

They forget things.

They are so unique.

I mean, I never forget things. No, not me. (Even before the drugs today, I couldn't remember the name of the procedure and I still don't.)

Try to contain your disappointment, people.

I'm a sick person, that's well established, and everything is usually under control.

Not right now.

A kidney stone is attacking me, I feel like, in addition to the usual knives, I'm being ripped apart if I do something outrageous like get off my bed.

Something like that requires some pain medication. That pain medication makes me sleepy and foggy.

Also, I'm in pain.

So fuck Pluggers til I feel better/get bored.

Monday November 9th

The comic:


But that only happens if you shave that spot in the first place - who shaves the top of their ears? What? This makes no sense at all. Maybe I'm hallucinating? Nah, I may be boring, but not that boring.

I hope.

Saturday November 7th

The comic:

Pluggers are cruel, fickle beasts.

Friday November 6th

The comic:


She'll just use the computer to watch movies, don't worry.

November 5th

The comic:


Pluggers have trouble walking. That is sad.

But not so sad that I can't mock them on other times.

Like, I couldn't walk yesterday. But you could still bash me for other things. A disability does not define a person.

I can respect that Pluggers have trouble walking while still considering them idiots.

Also, didn't Cain kill his brother? Are all Pluggers in prison for fratricide?

Wednesday November 4th

The comic:


Chocolate has an expiration date?

And talk about your generic generics! "Milk Choklit"? Surprised they spelled Milk right.

I can't tell what that's supposed to be - it looks like either an extra larger chocolate bar or some kind of (usually bitter) baking chocolate. So they bake a lot?

Or they like chocolate.

Sent in by a man, illustrated with a female creature. Bien sûr.

Actually, I think I've had Hershey's Kisses past their "best eaten by" date. They'd melted and fused with the wax paper and/or they were rock hard.

Anyways, what sets Pluggers apart from the rest of us? Chocolate - except for baking chocolate - isn't meant to last. It's for eating.

But no, this is supposed to suggest that Pluggers eat a lot, especially the ladies, ya know what I mean? Ha ha ha. Isn't it HILARIOUS? Why aren't you laughing?

No, wait, what was it in MAD's parody of Mad About You (Too Bad About You)? They replaced the laugh track with a "how true, how true" track. (Don't have book with me.)

But Pluggers can't make up its mind - either we're busting a gut laughing at ourselves, or we're nodding thoughtfully, how true, how true. That's the intent.

My reactions are divided into two categories - WTF?! and ::sigh:: Occasionally I get "inspired" and read something dark into it - treason, murder, cannibalism - but usually it's me blathering on about how little sense/how boring it is.

And then we all suffer.

Tuesday November 3rd

The comic:


But that would require book larnin', wouldn't it?

Slide rules aren't that old - in one of my Bloom County books, a slide rule asks Oliver why he doesn't use him any more, and Oliver can't be more than ten. So... people younger than my mom used slide rules. Or could have. She's never mentioned them. Of course, Oliver is a special case.

Slide rules - the abacus heaved a sigh of relief when it was replaced as the go to "Old stuff good! New stuff bad!" punchline in "jokes."

Monday November 2nd

The comic:



Glory be! I know ya'll were tense, lord knows I was. (Especially since on the day the first bit of horrifying news was published, the issue had already been resolved - aw, comics try to stay current! They're so cute! Except Mallard Fillmore - that delay just ugh.)

Anyways, wouldn't most Pluggers drive up to the post office dropbox?