Saturday February 28th

Wow. I just discovered I didn't do a comic for the 21st. Ya'll are ever so vigilant. Friday's was late because if I stayed up I'd get sucked into reading Bollywhat captions and I needed my sleep and I wasn't going to do it before school because I hate this.

The comic:

You're in the sun, all the seats are heated.

In fact, those lovely leather seats are probably hotter than whatever part of the engine is supposed to be hot.

There's something missing from the caption - "If you do your homework first." But they're Pluggers, they're honest, no one would cheat them, and they don't need fancy research or anything, they go by the gut.

They are idiots.

Friday February 27th

The comic:

Pluggers does not require me to use fucking google, okay?

Pretentious idiot.

And we don't even see the spoon bending action. I assume it's in half, because everyone bends them a bit on rock hard ice cream, so this must be some major bending action, like Bender in a Plugger suit.

Well, we're waiting.

Thursday February 26th

The comic:


This looks like a classic. Maybe not with a tree, but a female hanging things out to dry and the caption saying something about conserving energy? Yeah, seen it.

Though this is new, and disturbing - a 12 year old contributor! I had to read Alley Oop for the DCR, and there were all these kids sending in dino drawings to a 75 year old comic... yeah right!

Kid, you creep me out. I hope you did this as a joke, knowing it would get published. Or, yeah, parents made you.

Wednesday February 25th

The comic:



I loves me some RhinoMan, but damn, did not need this image.

At any time, in any frame of mind.

Why is shoeless, when we've seen female Pluggers in blobby tennis shoes all the damn time? Why not draw his feet, eh?

And that is one rotten drawing - if the drawstrings couldn't be drawn because he's too fat (because he's a Plugger, duh!), there wouldn't be so much left over!

His drawstrings may not be drawn, but his expression certainly his. (Drawn is another way of saying depressed, right?) He's gonna feel the economic problems ahead of his Plugger brethren, I mean, this year. He looks beyond tired. Don't drink the rat poison!

Tuesday February 24th

The comic:


And yet the barber is pictured as asking.

Of course, the customer is a dog, for extra weirdness.

I got nothing.

Yesterday, Pluggers dried my tears. Now, they've brought me down from my Dehli-6 cloud. (Which I saw in a real theatre. Abhishek Bachchan on the big screen! As Lord Hanuman intended!)

I mean, I could write for hours on the ending and why Roshan did that, but did you see that dove fly away? He took my creative energy.

Pluggers, where Bollywood emotions go to die.

Monday February 23rd

The comic:


I'm going to lose some readers over this, but I hate grape jelly. I'm a jam girl. Jelly is too much like jello, which is great, just not on my sandwich.

And white bread? I had to settle for white bread today, and I survived, but still. Wheat me.

And "Jiffy" and look, she was a choosy mom and now she's a choosy grandmom. How touching.

Barfdoodles.

Well! I just watched My Brother Nikhil, and the last ten minutes made me cry like it was my sibling dying, and what do you know? All the tears are gone! Pluggers are good for something.

Friday February 20th

The comic:


Get out of my life!

Not that I've ever been to Branson or Pigeon Forge. I'm not a senior, I'm not a Plugger. I'm just maintaining chronic conditions and missing a gland or something that has been replaced with chemicals that must be ingested daily.

I only see 2 prescriptions, or meds, on that list. The rest are OTC that can be bought anywhere.

But isn't it true for all seniors? And all "sick" people? (You know, taking 10+ pills a day, but healthy enough to function and travel.)

Grr.

Thursday February 19th

The comic:


That ain't no newborn!

And I'm no expert, but I think something goes in near the top of the baby before you get to its bottom...?

EW EW EW EW EW EW

Also, WHAT THE FUCK? "careers as parents"? And where do non-Pluggers begin? Do we hire this out? Oh, right, we all have nannies.

CAREERS AS PARENTS? I get it, "start at the bottom" like in a job, got to make the halves match.

So wrong on so many levels.

And I see no one commented on my demented post yesterday. Arre, you couldn't do better with that mess?

Wednesday February 18th

The comic:


I stayed up for this shit?

Oh well, I had fun reading some Bollywhat threads and thinking about how hot SRK is.

What?

What the fuck am I supposed to say?

That's what you get for marrying an actual cow and letting her lick your head? Or his mom is the cow, and she does that mom thing where they spit on their hand and then clean your face. (Never seen it in real life, but Pluggers aren't real either.)

I'm tired. The weather is crazy ass crazy. My Bollywood films aren't here yet. There's school in the morning. And hail. And bah. And this man makes more than I will ever make. Oh god, I just thought of the people behind Beetle Bailey. (I respect Jim Davis - there is some new life in Garfield, though screw the movies. I guess, I haven't seen them. Maybe they're lovely. They're all lovely people.)

I will move and it will hurt and then my alarm will go off and it will hurt and then that fucking speech god fucking required classes - I want a job that allows me to disappear down a hole for 8 hours a day, doing God knows what. I don't want to make presentations. "Great energy, but you need to calm down some more." If I calm down, I won't have the "great energy." At least she didn't take points off for my experiment, no matter how bad it went. (I think people would rather watch SRK and a female dancer (for the dewds) dance and sing for 5 minutes than listen to me talk, but no.)

Where was I.

Oh yes.

Post college is harder than this, and just like Marion's posted "We're better than you because we're COUNTRY!" list, people who don't go to college work harder than those who do. Ok, trade places.

My head hurts.


Well I hope this has been educational. This is the kind of person who thinks they can comment on Pluggers. I find it odd that this rambly nonsense comes after 3 tests and a speech, not during the stressed out week. Adrenaline's gone and I know I'll need it again to claw my way to Friday.

I get to see Slumdog Millionaire again on Friday! That's good.



And that Plugger should put on another pair of glasses, than his cowlick will consist of 2 hairs.

OR (I've been reading the BW caption thread too much)

"Your combover's not fooling anybody, Salman." No, not Salman. He goes shirtless too often, and oh, my eyes! Let's just drop the name.

"The combover ain't workin'."

Good night, I'll be here all week, delusion as always, try the veal, it squeals.

Tuesday February 17th

The comic:



All I saw was the speech balloon at first, and all I thought was EW!

Now to read the rest of it.

They've done this before, though I guess the fact that the drawing differs greatly is a plus. At least he's not wearing both pairs already.

Though I don't like seeing her beady little eyes. And I don't get his look of panicked stupidity. No, you can't read the menu. Yes, it's scary. Please, scare the rest of us by looking like you've been caught in headlights. (That's what they get for building their fancy restaurant in the middle of a highway!)

And what does a male Plugger need to read a menu for? He wants a hunk of dead cow, his she-nag will tell him the cheapest one available, since apparently she's not blind. But don't worry, he'll still drive. (And open her door! Chivalry ain't dead, ya know!)

Monday February 16th

The comic:


So no one would do any acts of chivalry if they weren't broke.

Also, what if his passenger isn't his wife, or even a woman? (Like his mom?)

Does he get out after saying, "The lock's busted," or does he leave them in there to succumb to the elements?

And what if his wife is driving? Does she become the chivalrous one then?

Pluggers are dingbats.

Saturday February 14th

The comic:



Happy Valentine's Day to those of you who like that sort thing. Me, well candy is cheaper tomorrow.

I can't believe there wasn't something cheesy today. Quite disappointed.

And confused.

"Always"? So some of the non-Plugger bailouts have involved buckets? What the hell is he talking about?

And, of course, as a bear, the whole swimming thing...

Wouldn't it be more realistic for a Plugger to be bailing out a flooded out basement after "fixing" the plumbing? Not all Pluggers have boats, even the licensing and whatnot (like being by a boat worthy body of water) for decrepit ones is a bit beyond most Pluggers' means.

Friday February 13th

The comic:


Oh, augh! Thanks a lot! I really needed to see this.

And because he's a friggin dog using SCISSORS, he will require a plastic surgeon to repair his face in three, two, one.

And yes, all non-Pluggers get nose jobs. It's the only way to tell the two groups apart, really.

Thursday February 12th

The comic:


You're a plugger if you think that's funny.

Wednesday February 11th

The comic:



I remember this one. Or at least, I think I remember the drawing. I don't think I've ever seen the blog in any form here.

There's a difference because your diary has a lock and is read by no one else, ideally. A blog? Well, five people read it, on average. But it's out there in the public, anyone can read it.

I'm surprised they got blogging right, or close to right. Some people have referred to talking as blogging, and assume every time you type on the computer, you're writing a blog! (No, I'm working on my homework. It's called Word! Some people even have computer diaries, which they do not put online.)

Plus, judging from what I'm seen, Pluggers are online a lot. And they have blogs, thanks to good ol' Blogger and other such free templates for blogs.

One last thing - that is a very uncomfortable writing position, I don't care how juicy the gossip is!

Tuesday February 10th

The comic:


Damn right it's a classic, we just saw it last week! I guess the son's younger, and still on his work insurance. Or older, and using Medicare for all its worth before it goes broke.

Anyways, a lot of creativity here.

They switched the child's gender, and instead of the parent on the phone, there are now two almost identical Pluggers in the panel! And instead of insurance issues and advice, we get commiseration. Being a Plugger is hereditary!

Oh, and now it's from Canada.

Monday February 9th

The comic:


When I saw the Plugger swearing about expired things, I assumed it was the food, and I was like, well, that's what you get for shopping at the 33 cent store!

This is quite unrealistic - don't people with lots of expired coupons pull them out at the register? Why is she being so considerate? She's planning ahead!

Though she could have really planned ahead and tossed out the expired ones before she went - I used to do that every Sunday after reading the paper. The only annoying thing (for my mom, who would have been doing it), was me asking what the hell we bought.

And market loss? A non-Plugger's market loss is... nothing, unless we work in the world of retail! (I'm guessing. Not a marketing major here.)

Saturday February 7th

The comic:


This drawing looks so familiar, because I remember puzzling over the mirror, or perhaps that's just because I've seen mirrors like that in real life.

What reason does a Plugger have to wear a tie? Oh, right, deaths and marriages.

It is odd that the Plugger in question has everything else fitting, well, "right" as he sees it, except that tie. Who wears ties with jeans again?

The proportions of the belly are all wrong. Trust me, I'm fat. I know, I'm a fat woman, so it goes in different places, but I'm also a people watcher. And I ain't never seen a real person look like that. Male or female. Even in that stock footage of the fat people's bodies without faces they run on the news every time there's time some story about obesity.

So what I don't know about cars, well, multiply that, because this is men's clothing. (Though I've often thought it would be cool to wear a tie, though only if you're flat-chested.) Father wore uniform most of the time he was there, uniform had no tie.

But this does not seem plausible to me. Having trouble finding good pants because of your size, that does. But those are so expensive and so out of the way (especially for Pluggerville and someone used to sweats) that bitching about the tie sounds like somebody with their priorities out of whack, or at least somebody who only notices the latest problem. (I was trying to think of better examples, something about a limo and the price of ... something, but I am so tired.)


Then again, there's a whole 'nother side. "ties these days" and the tie over informal clothes - somebody who's been retired for a few years is going back into the work force and needed a new tie, since their old ones had just gone back out of fashion.

Friday February 6th

The comic:


You're a plugger if you don't realize that they're about to be torn down for a new Wal-Mart. And then you can add their names to their list while enjoying low, low prices!

Thursday February 5th

The comic:


Way to really narrow down your readers, Pluggers!

And her question is kind of mean, see, since whatever you tell her to do, she will do the opposite. If she's smart. I mean, they just called him a Plugger for living long enough so his daughter will be old enough to qualify for Medicare while he can still give cogent advice. Or they were young parents.

Wednesday February 4th

The comic:


More about food today.

I had an idea, and then I lost it.

RhinoMan has a fridge? And not-yet-expired food?

On Monday, I revealed my love of fried Spam. (Though not this other spam creation foisted on me at my volunteer job... I recall eggs... and a trashcan.) I've tried fried BALONEY. Meh.

Want to know something? I came home from class today and slept for like 3 hours. Cold medicine normally turns people into zombies, but hey! Think you're "better" and go out when it's below freezing! And don't take the fricking 'quil the night before or the day of, because hey, "it makes me sleepy". In French today, after I finished the quiz (I actually put "Je ne sais pas maintenant" - the answers had to be in French, maybe I'll get credit for that!) I remember thinking why am I in this tiny seat still, why doesn't the Secret bullshit work?

Oh, so the Secret is old news.

This is a blog about Pluggers.

Pluggers who are about to get food poisoning.



Hey, hey, you know what would be smart.

If he opted for the vegetarian option of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Hahahahahaha.


Though, since he's a Plugger, the peanut butter may be from the first Bush administration. Or the last Democratic one, got to update those "this is so old" references for the new administration.

But then he'd be stuck with old food, and he can't throw it out, there are starving children in Africa! And he can't, like, send it to them, since it's about to go so damn bad.

So eat it, dingbat. Those numbers are chiseled in stone, they aren't estimates. Hope your run of good luck continues.

Tuesday February 3rd

The comic:


"Why did you lose my order?"

"Well, sir, if I updated my "filing system," I just wouldn't be folksy enough."

"You're an idiot!"

"But I'm folksy." Tips hat, walks out.

Monday February 2nd

The comic:


What the fuck is chicken cordon bleu?

And dammit, I am missing out on a big part of college life by not nuking my ramen. Of course, I could just go down the basement kitchen and cook it on the stove (the wrong way, I'm sure, but it's right for me.)

Ramen is only part of my home life, and when my roommate nukes hers, the smell makes me homesick.

I like the chicken one, it's the only one I like, but I'd never eat it with anything else, especially spam. Barf.

Why is chicken cordon bleu so damned important? Why do they have to be so fake? (The Pluggers, I mean.) I'm all for getting the nutrients in cheaply, but damn, chicken cordon bleu chicken cordon bleu... what is that about? Am I a non-Plugger for not knowing or caring?

And spam is only good in slices, fried and then in a sandwich with some mayo. Wheat bread, so we aren't totally déclassée.