Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Wednesday December 31st

The comic:

I do remember this one, but I'm too lazy to look it up, and as a New Year's Gift, no one should look it up. It's bad enough we have to see it again.

I'm sure I said something disparaging and elitist.

I just don't remember it being called the resume, because the resume gag was used before for writing on the side of the car, but no, bumper stickers are your resume.

Only the Navy one, dammit, why does he have to be Navy? I can't knock Navy, my mom was Navy! My Dad has a PBA sticker on his car (or did), that's your resume on your car. (He gave one to my sister to help her in case she got in trouble on the road. He's Navy as well, and if Mom wasn't, I'd totally trash them.)

I guess Pluggers think the fact that they were born in America (to American parents) was because of something they did, not a quirk of fate. Pluggers may call themselves humble, but really, they're self-centered assholes.

And with that cheery note, we leave 2008 behind.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Tuesday December 30th

The comic:

I do remember this and being grossed out by this.

But I think there was more to my reaction, though I'll be damned if I know what it was.

Like why should it matter to his parents if he broke something at somebody else's house? That's why you take the little buggers to other people's houses in the first place, right?

Monday, December 29, 2008

Monday December 29th

The comic:

This was a Sunday strip, I'm sure, because I know I'd remember this.

He looks as scared as if he did kill somebody.

So is this before the murder? She's playing detective before she kills him and turns him into cookies to replace the ones he stole. The grandkids are coming over later, you know! The blood? In the pitcher, so they can have Kool-Aid!

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Saturday December 27th

The comic:

I definitely remember this one.

Ew, a thousand times over.

But remember - this is more important than honoring real American idols - soldiers, firefighters, and cops. Or it has more of what makes a Plugger a Plugger in 2009.

Yeah, brain bleach please?

Friday, December 26, 2008

Friday December 26th

The comic:

I do remember this, and I remember saying a lot about it. Mostly about how stupid they were, how stupid Pluggers were, how stupid I was for doing this. The usual.

Happy Boxing Day.

Weirdest present - 2 pouches of starkist tuna from my maternal grandmother. They beat out not one, but two subway giftcards.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Thursday December 25th

The comic:

Glurge alert, this is not a drill!

You know, I have expected at least a credit to "Pluggers everywhere."

Oh my god, that tree is in a tire.

But it's outside.

Why does it need a tree stand if it's outside? Has everyone in Pluggerville reverted to their animal ways and abandoned the house, but not the tree?

This is disturbing.

No decorations, they depend on nature for everything.

So how did that tire get there?!

As for Christmas, well, if you celebrate, Merry Christmas. If you don't, I hope you have a great day and enjoy the TV marathon of your choice.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Wednesday December 24th

The comic:

We've abandoned the countdown for Christmas. Prepare for glurge onset tomorrow!

She is wearing tennis shoes. Really.

This is the only time during the holiday season that I am glad I have never seen the movie. And since I've been in college, I've avoided November Christmas music.

Yes, they get annoying, but damn, I didn't realize how much I miss the traditions. Or what they were. When Hollie helped us decorate the tree, she lived down the street. Now she's a mom. In the next county.

Whoops, starting to identify with Pluggers.

But seriously, do people watch the movie more than once in one day? Really?

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Tuesday December 23rd

The comic:

I do remember this one.

Let me take a second and say that I am disappointed. No, not in the comic, that could never happen again. You guys. I keep expecting somebody somebody smarter and wittier than me to pop up with the link to the post to the ones I do remember, but it never happens. "But we have jobs! And families! LIVES!" Pish tosh.

Back to the comic, I'm sure I called bullshit the first time, but it deserves to be called again.

Pluggers are lazy. They know it, we know it.

Of course, technology is terrifying, and part of that technology must include remote controls. But if you've got little kids, surely you've got a remote and it's your parents that are without?

Seeing the antenna reminded me of the digital switch. I hope it is addressed by a Plugger.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Monday December 22nd

The comic:

I do remember this one!

I don't remember what I said about it, nor how I classified it.

He looks pissed, but he's also incredibly stupid.

Has he never heard of the AARP? Old people are retired and have time on their hands, so even though they are all lumped together demographically, they can make a lot of noise.

Why do you think people dread the aging of the baby boomers?

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Saturday December 20th

The comic:

Oh shit no we did not see this.

Or did we?

God, I watched an episode of House and then I looked it up on Wikipedia and got myself depressed, and dammit, there was fire and mom woke me up, and I have seen this, because I remember covering it.

I thing.

I hope.

It was a Sunday one. Damn, I could have missed it.

I want to see him draw a Plugger Facebook, personally. We all know what a Plugger Twitter would be, a birdfeeder. (Though I don't know if Twitter is big enough to cross their radad, because my sister hasn't heard of it or maybe I'm getting the name wrong but I keep seeing Twitter everywhere, and she's the normal one in the family. I'm the one who knows when Boxing Day is and said, "I have an appointment on Boxing Day, Mom." Should have called her Mum . It seems very funny to me right now, and I feel quite blue.)

You know what, when I think of the worst Myspace pages, the ones that crash your computer with all their blinking nonsense and songs, I think of Pluggers. Annoying people are beginning to equal Pluggers in my world.

Friday, December 19, 2008

Friday December 19th

The comic:

Okay, I definitely don't remember this. Maybe it ran on a Sunday?

Of course this was sent in by a man (this is Pluggerville, where stereotypes run wild). He's heard his wife talk about his embarrassing clothing, and this is what he does.

Notice the look in her eyes. She's given up. She knows he will only write down what she said in exasperation, laughing, and never change. I bet he chose this afternoon's venue, too.

Plaid pants? They make those outside of the pajama section? Really?

Also, this was a more important Pluggers than yesterday's. Keep that in mind. Something about plaid that repeats nonsense about how no men care about clothing was more important than hero-worship.

I think I'll repeat that for the rest of this insipid countdown.

Plugger sighting out of Florida, courtesy of the TeeVee.

"I believe getting your hands dirty is the best way to keep your head clean." Classic pluggerism.

Of course, the one before is a bit against what we've seen, but I'm sure they'd say something like "the view from your porch beats the view from your sofa."

Being Pluggers, the sofa is on the porch.

There is another one, and it is worse though only a bit harder to find. (I found this one, I'm done.) The same guy lets us know he believes that baseball caps should not be worn backwards. (Edgy!) And the view from something beats the view from a psychiatrist's couch. I think. Something about how real Pluggers don't need shrinks and wear their baseball caps properly.

I actually am not a big fan of orange juice.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Thursday December 18th

The comic:

Gag me with a spoon.

I know cops.

I know soldiers.

I don't know any firepeople. Maybe they really are great people, I don't know.

But cops? Bah. ::grump::

Picture this. You're an average American kid. Your whole life, you've been told you can go to the police when you're in trouble, or if somebody touches you, whatever. So you're watching the news with your family, and there's your high school on the TV. Turn's out there's been an undercover police officer at the school for a few months. Everyone figures out who it was, even if they don't say. What the hell, man? Sure, the undercover doesn't force anyone to buy drugs (not this time), but damn, way to make me trust cops.

And my dad's a cop.

And I love my relatives, I do, honestly. Uncle Danny went to Iraq for both wars, and I hope he doesn't have to go back. But I've never noticed a real patriotic or heroic air about him.

They're human, too.

And I read this article about firemen saying don't call them heroes, this is their job, and they get off on the adrenaline rush.

And it's subtitle has the word I've been looking for this entire post "firefighters". (Hard to find - so many things about Sept 11th!)

Anyways, it seems we're in for reruns. Well, I'm a ditz, so while I think I recognize this comic, I don't know when it appeared. (And there's nothing in it to make it pop up in a tag search, though I almost added "gag me with a spoon" tonight.)

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Wednesday December 17th

The comic:

Are those DVDs? They look too thin to be tapes?

I hope he checks for scratches.

And why would he buy them, if he's only going fall asleep, as we learned yesterday?

Now, why is she holding a lamp? To encourage reading or to make sure he stays awake? (By keeping the light on or by hitting him, I don't care, whatever works.)

Also, those hands/paws are scary. They don't look like they can hold onto those things much longer.

Yeah, I don't have much to say. Classic Pluggers that manages to avoid the fat or old "jokes" - Reed Hoover sent it in, there's a pun, there's a Plugger definition, and Pluggers are cheap. (Though who doesn't love garage sales? I did get a movie at one - The Santa Clause on tape. Still like that movie.)

I'm not a Bond fan, but I must say I am surprised he didn't have any of these already. I know he's cheap, but no one would buy him a present?

Or perhaps he only has these on tape. Pluggers can't pass up a bargain!

I wonder if he even has a DVD player.

One last thought - this is one labored set-up. "Discounted Bonds" are only one thing - the James Bond movies (or, less likely the books) for sale at a lower price. Just a very unlikely thing to come across. Stupid.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

I heard a Plugger whining on the radio today!

Er, singing.

I had a doctor appointment at 8:30 this morning in the city, and there was black ice on some of the roads, so all the driving was insane, so we had to listen to the radio. Mom's the driver, Mom still likes country music, we listened to country music.

Luckily, I stopped the Toby Keith song in its tracks, but still caught this by Jason Michael Carrol, called "Where I'm From." It's just whiny as hell, and the bit I heard reminded me of Pluggers.

On a three hour flight from Memphis to LA
I was silently celebrating my first class upgrade
Laughing at my jeans and my boots
Beside those high dollar shoes and Armani suits

I turned it down and was like "But the whole California culture is laidback, everyone wears jeans, who gives a damn about blue jeans?"

That's what I heard.

Now I'm looking at the rest of the lyrics.

I did not know Pluggers had recording contracts.

I said I'm from the front pew of a wooden church
The courthouse clock still don't work
Where a man's word means everything
Where moms and dads were high school flames
Gave their children grandmothers maiden names
It may not sound like much
But its where I'm from


Where the quarterback dates the homecoming queen
The trucks are ford and tractors green
And amazing Grace is what we sing
There's a county fair every fall
Your friends are there every time you call
Yeah It may not sound like much but it's
Where I'm from

I used to love country music, and it was stuff like this that drove me away. I could not handle the sap, the feeling of persecution and being the best of the best that went hand in hand.

It's like, you may look down on me, but I'm better than you, because my way of life is simpler. Why is simpler better? BECAUSE IT IS. City folks ask too many questions.

Tuesday December 16th

The comic:

Ooh, gutsy.

I dare somebody who gets this in their paper to write in and complain about the implied bad language.

Ok, one, yes, he is asleep, but he cannot be comfortable. And his age (and mine, and I'm just 20), reclining is the least you can do for your back. Do Pluggers think comfort is a sin?

Also, I understand the tragedy of missing the ending of a movie, you just pop it in later and watch the rest. Right?

Oh, no, it just hit me. Pluggers watch movies they already have memorized so if they fall asleep, it won't be a big deal. That also explains why they never try anything new - they're afraid they'll fall asleep and miss part of it. Well guess what? Wednesday night, I slept through the first ten minutes of a new Daily Show. Through the miracle of reruns, I caught the segments on Comedy Central Thursday morning at nine AM. Magic!

Pluggers are lazy.

And they're not even good at it. You should see our recliner. Right now, it has our demon dog, Wickett, on it, and he's grouchy. He growls whenever I get off the uncomfortable (and I think broken) computer chair. Like to turn off the light. Or leave the room.

But when he's not there... damn, that thing is nice. And you can see the TV. Lazy, lazy, lazy days are encouraged in that damn things.

If you're going to be lazy and fall asleep watching TV, try to be comfy.

Why can't Pluggers ever have fun?

I mean, he's wearing formal pajamas (no sweatpants and t-shirt for him, no sir!), a robe, and slippers. Our heater is on the fritz, so I get the layers. But the formality? Where are the blankies?

I only saw this movie once, but his movie watching outfit reminds me of the dad in Dead Poet's Society, and how SPOILER ALERT the night his son kills himself, he takes his slippers off just so. The dad was played by Kurtwood Smith, who later played Red on That '70s Show.

And the chips.

The unopened chips.

On the ground.

Not comfortably within reach.

I'm beginning to think Brookins doesn't like Pluggers either, or he'd draw them happy more often.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Monday December 15th

The comic:

How can RhinoMan afford such a spiffy looking camera?

He's RhinoMan. I mean, I love him, but he's broke. He's probably going to pay to get these developed with the money he got pawning his grandfather's camera.

There is nothing inherently "Pluggerish" about using such a camera. I realize they are still superior to digital cameras in a number of ways, plus they look cooler.

What makes you a dick, and a Plugger, is referring to developing a roll of film as "downloading."

Also, well a Plugger wouldn't, but don't most people who have cameras like that have their own dark rooms now?

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Some boastful nonsense

I am going to start contributing at the The Daily Comics Review, because the guy needs help. I keep telling him to narrow his focus, but hey, now I get to attack other comics.

And maybe other people will see it.

So, you few people who read this blog, read his! Comment!

Once I post there, I will put the link up to that post.

I had to talk about Pluggers first, because well, this is mine.

It's like 3:40. I slept late and since I'm home I don't have the only furniture in the house to myself, blah blah blah.

And here it is! I managed to plug the blog only twice. I think I'll go back and add it to the end. Bye!

Saturday December 13th

The comic:

Oh my god, I'm a Tiger.

And hopefully, I will still enjoy browsing antique stores when I am that old.

I will be a Plugger one day.

Please mourn for me.

Though, wait, it says "senior plugger," implying there are senior out there that are not Pluggers.

Thank God. We can get old and not become Pluggers! Rejoice!

Friday, December 12, 2008

Friday December 12th

The comic:

Is the Plugger the passenger or the cabbie? Seriously, I know it should be the cabbie, but still, I wonder.

And where the hell is the dialogue? This comic demands it.

Or is this just...

It's a pun.

Damn you all to hell.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Thursday December 11th

The comic:

I'm at home, and my puppies are totally awesome. Especially in comparison to that... thing up there.

I'm glad we haven't seen any cow Pluggers, actually not so glad, because the cannibalism tag is woefully underused.

When you're talking about the stock market or any market with regards to meat, don't you mean a farmer's market or something more personalized than Wal-Mart? I really wouldn't know. I know there are coupons for meat and the like, but a whole section reduced? Wouldn't the medical(vet) bills outweigh the initial savings?

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Wednesday December 10th

The comic:

At first, seeing just the speech balloon, I thought they were talking about their grandkids.

And wouldn't that make sense, if they've had their car since cars were invented? Shouldn't the car be paid off by now?

And of course the vet bill is more, everyone in Pluggerville goes to the vet!

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Rainy day Plugger sighting

Today's Bizarro!

Notice they, at least, look like real chickens.

Tuesday December 9th

The comic:

Since it's RhinoMan, let's assume he has a remote and a chair, but no TV.

That's why he doesn't look remotely happy or satisfied.

ETA: He does not have a TV. Thanks, Marion!

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Monday December 8th

The comic:

Pluggers actually live in places with parking meters?

That's all I've got to say. This is a step up from the extra yolk at least.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Saturday December 6th

The comic:

I think we've seen this license plate before.

No, I'm not surprised a Plugger voted for Nixon. What does surprise me is the car - a Plugger has a car that still runs 36 years later? (Or 40...)

Friday, December 5, 2008

Friday December 5th

The comic:

A little RhinoDude! What can this mean? Is he a cousin? A kid brother?


His son who he sees once a month because his now ex-wife got sick of his Plugger bullshit and wanted to limit the damage done to her child?

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Thursday December 4th

The comic:

A "senior" Plugger?

That is one uncomfortable looking chair. Only a Plugger would keep and use an uncomfortable chair for 60 odd years.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Wednesday December 3rd

The comic:

Never mind the size of the kids, let's blame it on too much work and not enough nutrition and sunlight.

But the expressions.

Holy hell.

I know we're lazy as kids, but dishes aren't that horrifying a prospect. Now, picking up the dog's poop, that's another story.

Brookins can't do facial expressions right - the bigger kid looks evil and the younger one looks terrified.

Also, the bribe seems weird. If a 12-year-old Plugger has an ipod, wouldn't a 10-year-old? Not to mention vague - doesn't everyone listen to music while doing dishes? And what good does someone else's ipod do you? If they're siblings, they probably don't listen to the same music. (To have one more thing to fight over rather than different interests.)

Of course, these are Plugger dishes. I can't imagine the horror. Maybe they push the job away because Grandpa walks up all the time telling them to stop bitching about not having a dishwasher because he didn't have running water. Or food.

Tuesday December 2nd

The comic:

I'm surprised he's not using a straight razor.

Is that what he's doing with his other hand? I'm not a guy, and I don't have any memories of my dad shaving. (He had (still has?) a mustache.) I have no idea.

The idea of a dog shaving, ow my head. My babies ran away today. My mom left the gate open today while bringing in firewood, and my sister doesn't do jack shit around the house unprompted, and my mom is stressed out, and she called me and damn, I'm just glad they're all back.

But what do you say? Mom feels like shit, she yells at Becky, Becky yells back, I just feel miserable and confused. At least I know I'm going home as soon as I can, instead of spending a few quiet days in the dorm with no homework to worry about after my last exam. Family needs me as a mediator and gate-closer/obsessive door-locker.


Pluggers are old. But still young enough to be trusted with razors.

What? There isn't a lot to work with!

You know how has a comments sections for each day's comic? I've read a few of the Plugger comments. Unlike the Dick Tracy ones, these are mostly posted by genuine fans. And the official Plugger website used to have a message board.

The main message from both these places is that this is not supposed to be funny, but it is supposed to be familiar. We are supposed to nod and say, "This is my life." It reminds me of the opening splash of MAD's parody of Mad About You where somebody says that instead of a laugh track, the show has a "how true, how true" track. (Or something to that effect. The book's at home.)

But Pluggers are both 80% of our population and old. And usually men. The too broad mission statement is what bugs me the most. "What, you don't live like this? Or, if the genders are wrong, know someone like this? What's wrong with you?" seems to be the underlying premise. Of course, I have this tag called "non-Pluggers suck," so this isn't a big surprise or anything. I just can't think of anything to say about the comic itself and felt that I'd been abandoning you guys lately with short posts. Plus, I went to bed at 9 last night, so I'm just being stupid and staying up late.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Monday December 1st

The comic:

Who is he talking to? I thought it was a child or wife in the passenger seat begging the old man driver to speed up.

But no, Pluggers aren't old today, they just don't take care of their possessions.


The comic is reproduced here for purposes of review only, and all rights remain with the creator, Gary Brookins.